handsome, dome-topped building — now splendidly spot—lit at night — has been extended at the back and now houses the Mitchell Theatre/Moir Hall as well. A good place for a quiet hour or two and — for students — a good alternative to the often frantic University Libraries. Open Mon—Fri 9.30am-9pm. Sat 9.30am—5pm. Quiet places are even harder to find in the City Centre — unfortunately Glasgow does not have a central park — possibly the closest thing is Custom House (luay Gardens on the banks ofthe Clyde. just off Clyde Street behind St Enoch Square — small but pretty in summer the gardens give some opportunity to escape the noise and bustle of the . city for a few minutes. i CORRECTION The entry prices for The Tenement House 145 Buccleuch Street are in fact 90p adults. 45p children not (£1 .20 and 60p as stated in the last issue of The List). That makes life in turn-of—the-century Glas ow better value still! RAIL AYS The quickest and easiest way to get out of the city. Queen Street for trains East and North — Stirling and Edinburgh are good day trips. Central for journeys South and West — popular destinations Ayr. Largs. Gourock. all within an hour‘s train journey and will soon be even quicker when the electrification of the line is complete. Blue Line Trains leave from all over the city and just a short ride away is the beauty of Helensburgh — next to the ugliness of Faslane Nuclear Submarine Base - or Loch Lomond near Balloch. Strathclyde Transport have a number of excellent schemes for family rail travel run in conjunction with ScotHall which are worth investigating. SHOPPING In a few years‘ time Glasgow is going to have more _ shopping centres than you can shake a stick at. Parithead Forge and St ' Enoch are coming and work is well under way on the Sauchiehall Centre improvements. Princes Square and the new Buchanan Street Complex will also be with us before long and no one can tell if Glasgow can sustain this amount of retail space. Meanwhile Glasgow is still more than adequately provided for. The
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old standbyes ofArger Street and Sauchiehall Street still lead the way. although the latter has been left
two still house the mega-stores and chains.
TRAMS Can be found at the Museum at Transport 25 Albert Drive. Opened in 1964. the former Copelawhlll Tram Depot houses everything from the aforementioned and much-loved old
Glasgow trams to buses. trains. cars. carriages and even an autogyro. Together with the People's Palace. this is one of Glasgow‘s neglected museums, although it is to be hoped that it gets the number ofvisitors it deserves when it moves to its new home in the Kelvin Hall. Open Mon—Fri 10am-5pm and Sun 2—5pm. Admission is free. Go tomorrow!
I behind somewhat of late, but these I !
UNDERGROUND The quickest way to
58 The List 22 Aug — Sept
days. Adult £2. Child £1.
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get around Glasgow. Re-opened in the late Seventies. Glasgow Underground is one of the smallest and dinkiest in the world - a fact quickly recognised by the native who dubbed it the ‘clockwork orange'. For a flat fare of 35p you can whizz round the Inner and Outer Circles as far as you want. although it is usually so loud. busy. smelly and hot you won‘t want to stay on any longer than strictly necessary. Since it only runs under a very small portion of the city centre and west. it is of limited use. but traffic jams being what they are. in Glasgow it is by far the quickest and frequently cheapest mode of travel in the city.
VICTORIA PARK In Victoria Park Drive North. off the Clydesidc Expressway is one of the most pleasing parks in the city. Walks. ﬂowers. sport and just lying about — Victoria Park has them all. It also has the strange and interesting Fossil Grove where you can see plants. trees. etc. literally millions of years old. Open Daily Sam—Dusk and Suns lOam—Dusk.
WALKS Guided tours of Glasgow leave George Square (at the lions) at 103m. 2pm and 6pm Mon—Thurs. Each tour lasts about 2 hours and costs £2 for adults and £1 for children. The itinerary is as follows: Mon — North-East; Tue — South East; Wed — City Centre; Thurs —
Clydesidc. On Friday the tour is
round the West End and departs
from the Mitchell Library North Street.
XENOPHOBIA Glaswegians have a reputation for friendliness unparalleled in Britain. although it is not perhaps as prevalent as it once was. They still regard large numbers of tourists as a novelty and haven‘t had to become as rude. capitalist. resigned. sorry. as the good citizens of Edinburgh. Largely speaking. Glaswegians are very proud and defensive about their city and are keen to accept anyone showing an interest in it. unless. ofcourse. they are English.
YOUTH HOSTELS Young visitors to Glasgow should make a bee-line for 11 Woodlands Terrace. where the Scottish Youth Hostel Association is. Consequently this part oftown sees a lot of blond Scandinavian types with rucksacks drinking in Kelvingrove Park. It‘s a good idea to know where the Association is. as it is odds-on that three times this summer. blonde. tanned youths with rucksacks. boots and woolly socks are going to ask you the way. It is on the N010. 11.44 and 59 bus routes going West.
200 Yes. Glasgow has got one and it has won awards too. It is home for tigers. lions. camels. leopards. monkeys. wallabies and. a favourite ofours. polar bears. There are guided tours and talks as well as a funfair. cafeteria and picnic area. Glasgow Zoo is at Calderpark in the South East of the city. Access is easy from the M8 and there are many bus services passing by: 35. 43. 44. 50. 53. 54. 55. 56. 249 and 242. Open 7
Paul 8. Davies presented the first Brogue Male at the Calton Studios during the Edinburgh Festival in 1982. A spoof radio show. a kind of souped-up Sherlock Holmes. the stage show has subsequently been turned into a radio series. This year Davies is back in Edinburgh with Brogue Male at Heriot-Watt Theatre (venue 7). 30 Grindlay Street. until 30 August. Edinburgh is a city he is glad to return to whatever time ofthe year...
I like the Stockbridge area of Edinburgh very much — it‘s the second time I‘ve stayed down herein the Colonies. A lot of the houses have been gentrified — full ofdistinctly yuppie types. but there are also a lot of fairly elderly residents who look as if they are from the first wave of people who moved in here. Presumably the houses were built by some philanthropic industrialist for the linen or haggis-weaving trade. Just around the corner you have the Botanic Gardens where I like to go for a walk to clear the head. particularly at the start ofa run.
There is something a little odd going on down there . . . Iwent fora jog the other day — as you can see I‘m in superb physical condition; eat a lot oforanges and make it a rule never to drink before ten in the morning. Anyway. I was just about to jog through the gates ofthe Botanics when a guy in a peaked hat popped his head out: ‘Nae jogging in the gardens.‘ It made me wonder. was it to do with the speed or was it the shorts. What would happen ifI walked fast in shorts. or ran in my ordinary clothes. The other thing that made me suspect that something is going on is that I can never. ever find out when the greenhouses are open. Whenever I go. whatever the time. they are closed — due to open at some other time. There‘s probably some horrid Triffid-like experiment gomg on.
Stockbridge also has a lovely old-fashioned swimming pool - just
to continue the theme ofexercise. fitness and general clean-living.
These baths are the Victorian open cubicle and no taking your trunks off in the showers sort of baths. It’s quite an odd building actually — it has sort of arrow slits around the top. A precaution in case the Turks reach the gates.
Round the corner there is a great delicatessen called Herbie’s. which I can‘t walk past without going into and buying something. It’s one ofthe best delicatessens I know. Last time I was there I noticed they had a large dish on the counter with a notice ‘Runny Brie’. I‘m telling you ifyou took the lid offa moment too long it would be out the door and belting down the road. Really radical Brie . . . I like my cheese to be a bit fundamental.
I‘ve got into a bit of a mess with my breakfasts at the moment. I plan to do a survey on breakfasts in Edinburgh. The other day we were desperately looking for the full Monty — bacon/eggs/sausage/tomato swimming in a pint of grease with a couple of slices ofwhite bread and margarine. and a large mug oftea that tastes of rhubarb. That‘s what we were all after — ofcourse it is all coffee rooms. brioches and croissants around here. Later. of course I remembered about Marty’s Grill in Haymarket — definitely on my psychic map of Edinburgh.
There are lots of good places for brunch — The Edinburgh Wine Bar is particularly nice on a Sunday with kedgeree and the papers. The Ping On Chinese restaurant in Stockbridge has prawn balls in batter with sweet and sour that men would die for. But I sem to have lost an Italian restaurant. It‘s on one of those roads running down to Princes Street and I‘m told it is still there but I have a feeling it may have slipped into an alternative universe.
Edinburgh has the distinction of having probably the tackiest shop in Britain — it‘s on Princes Street and sells gonks. It‘s so kitsch that I like it. I always have a good time in John
Dickson and Son in Frederick Street. It‘s the sort of place Sir Digby Spode would be very much at home in — a gunshop full of men with no chins buying fishing rods. and women with very large chins trying on waders. I spend a very happy Saturday morning each year trying out duck calls— I use them in the show but they always end up getting blocked up with shredded cabbage.
When I was playing at the Calton studios I used at go for strenuous walks up Arthur‘s seat. I love the haunt of the coot and the fern in any town and it is so nice to find so many outcrops ofgreenery in the middle of Edinburgh.
You have to get used to the Festival. I know it‘s fatal to go to the Fringe Club after two in the morning. It‘s like a 200 when the keepers have gone on strike; ankle