INSIDE 35 (G): 2 BACKLIST' GUEST “ST ROCK REPORT People “ml NU“ um A comprehensive surve} “might” of facilities available to 4 & 5 soungmaxioiansin (ilaxgmv and Izrlinhurgh uantingto rclcasc their mm record. lnlltclightul a \xawnl new Nam mum's. Allan lllllllL‘l‘Ctill\lLlCl‘\ lltl“ the warlslicinglrcatcrlmtlltc ~ . ' t n 7 l FOOD *‘y ' - a 1 _ . Cover photo: Still trom the A guide ItlL‘itllllg inthc mm 'Hamburgerflill’taken , , j : ciiiw'ihculrw bythe outstanding Vietnam lzrllnlwurgh and ( ilaxgtm i documentary photographer “mm” 46 Don McCullen. 15 1 NIGHTLIFE - SPO RT 3 Maul .can. Accounts 16 (icorgcllc Rutmick. Richard (Era); Typesetting .lu Kcnncd} andllcxwr ‘l‘cxr. Production Editor 17 Paul Kcir. Production Assistants Andrew Young. Sltcila Maclcan. ; Rosemary ( Boring. Art .\llcc Barn. Books Alan 21 'l'a}lor. Classical Music 1 ('arol Main. Dance Alice l I‘ \ Bain. Film Allan Hunter. I ' 'l’rcx'or Johnston. 23 é Folk/JaZZNtirman i a. _ v MzI ('ltalmcrx. Konn} I .v Malllicwrl, Kids Sall} | . I t, Kinncx thhtlrte Stuart l 31’; Raikcr. Open New 24 . - / 7 j Ralson. Rock(£dinburgh) ! ' l Alastair Mahlmtl. ROCK l ff (Glasgow).lnhn I Williamson. Listen! 25 l Alastair Malilmtt..lohn i \N'tlliamson. Sport Kenn} Ii Nathlcsun.chlealre Sarah EditorAllanllunlcr. cmmmll- amera l Design Simon listcrsun. l';lll'll‘l"’}1ll Mali1"”P l Publisher Rubin r lntlgc. Advertising & Circulation 5mm- 00"“ Editors Niucl lllllLll.S;ll';tll Rubin Hodge. Sicw “‘“f””"‘l~"”'“ll/CW" l llcmminu. Associate McCullough. Sheila 0999'" 5mm“ li“”‘"”-

Robert Dawson Scott considers the virtues of early withdrawal.

In a speech last weekend Robin Cook, M.P. tor Livingston. suggested that all the Scottish Labour M.P.s should ‘take themselves up and establish themselves in Scotland‘ in order to lurtherthe cause ol a legitimate Scottish Assembly. Capital, Ithought. Withdrawal lrom Westminster. What a great idea.

In tact, I thought it was such a good idea I began to apply it more widely.

Considerthe traltic jam; it you simply grin and bear it, who‘s going to know about the pulp to which all those lumes, all that aggravation, all that wasted time reduces you. Nexttime you‘re breaking the record tor the time it takes to get lrom Charing X to the Anderson Bridge don‘t just sit there; hop out, leave the car. and leg itto whereveryou can get a taxi. Your abandoned vehicle, and those at other LIST readers, will be a mute but eloquent statement which says, ‘No more!‘. "you‘re on the critical list in hospital and, it being the NHS, you're not getting the right treatment/drugs/attention, just take up your saline drip and walk. At least you can be sure at dying of what you went in with and not salmonella.

Actors and musicians should adopt the technique, too. It you don‘t seem to be getting through to your audience. who are obviously too bovine to appreciate what they are being otlered, why bother to linish the show? They

clearly weren‘t enjoying it and let‘s lace it neither were you. And ol course it you‘re involved in any sporting event which is not going your way, the obvious solution is to cut your losses and leave well belore the end. Think ot the problems Graeme Souness could save himsell it he just walked oll instead ol waiting to be sent all by the releree.

Just as my enthusiasm was reaching lever pitch. and the Queen was, in my mind‘s eye. relusing to have anything to do with That Bloody Woman. Mr Cook clarltied his remarks. He didn't mean withdrawing lrom Westminster altogether. Couldn't possibly do that, he says, important work to be done there. strict parliamentarian, represent constituents, etc. Just miss

out a couple ol days a week. Nonsense.

Where's your sense at adventure? Where‘s your commitmentto change? Whatever happened to radicalism? Just think ol the possibilities. How ditlerent our history books would have

been it the great leaders at the past had withdrawn a bit more readily. What it. in his tent on the plains ot llium. Menelaus had said ‘Look here. Agammemnon, old lruit, why don‘t we just call it a decade and push oll' instead ol carrying on horsing around? It would have saved Homer and Virgil a whole lot ol work tor a start and probably linished oll school Latin and Greek at a stroke. We could still be denying women the vote, crossing the

Atlantic by boat— always assuming that we didn‘t still think the world was flat— we could have avoided trade unions. missed out on Marilyn Monroe and never have heard ol the Beatles. Best at all Robert the Bruce could have ignored the tamousspiderand simply let Edward 1 get on with it. Then Mr Cook wouldn’t needto get excited abouta Scottish Assembly because there

would scarcely have been a Scottish nation to justily it. So come on, Bobbo; it's breaking up, not giving up, that's

hard to do.

The List 21 Aug— 3 Scpt1