Indeed Sirrah, It is a pleasure and an honour to halloo you again. I prithee direct me to the nearest place ofentertainment in order that I may spend my time more fortuitously.

Here, take a butcher’s at that there pages guv, and don’t call me Sarah or I’ll smash your teefin.

I HEY look, teach is learning the Lambada. maybe the stall aren'tso square alter all! Butthen who in their right mind dancesthe Lambada anyway? Nevertheless, the iorthcoming release, Lambada, complete with schoolmasters a gogo. will doubtless spawn a generation at sequels such as Goodbye Mr Twist and The Bells at St Trinlans. See Film Index page 15.


I RIGHT now. take your time love, relax. you just stand here while your partnerthrows the knives. In one! Oh that's your arm dear, well never mind. They were a lovely pair at contestants. Santa Sangre is Alejandro Jodorowsky's latestlilm. Demented ora work at genius? You are the rel. See Film Index pagels.

I EXCLUSIVE pics at The Proclaimers at Primary School. ‘When you go will you send back a copy at T-r-r-rainspotter’s Weekly?' Every primary school used to have at least one kid with the ubiquitous 'National Healthers', and Joseph Mackenzie has captured the ones in Glasgow during the Sixties in his Gorbals Children, Porttolio Gallery, Edinburgh, 7 Apr-5 May. See Art Listings page 53.



But a bridge?



(NolT. Hughes) Michael Boyd brings the Poet Laureate's poem sequence, Crow, to the stage at the Tron Theatre 14 Apr-4 May. See Theatre Listings page 45.

I” I,


a" 5

I FOR a “mattress believed their career was on the slide, but now Torvill and Scream (remember them?) return with a whole troupe ol Russians to strut

: their skates at a specially

iced-over SECC. Remember kids, don't try these ones at home. See Dance Listings page 50.

I SCOTS in space! Fuelled entirely by bottles at El Dorado, the project to gela Scot in space, code-named ‘GOTTE'— Get on That Tower Eck- will blast oil at Bellahouston Park early next year. In the meantime an exhibition at paintings at space travel by Scottish artists well known in the genre, can be seen atthe 90s Gallery, Glasgow, 7 Apr—2 May. See Art Listings page 53.

I ROCHDALE'S tinest young soul singer, eeh it’s Lisa Stanslield at Glasgow's Barrowland, 19 Apr. See Rock Listings page 28.

I SPOTthe hype. Using your skill and judgement place an X where you think

the meathead is.

Overblown, overlong and

over here: it's American

Footy. Edinburgh's us style

extragavaganza the Capitol

Bowl:8Apr,1pm. Meadowbank Stadium, Edinburgh. See Sport

Listings page 63.


2The List 6— 19 April 1990