: I A YOUTHFUL Bono lrom

U2, complete with a ski-lump hairstyle. waddles

1 down the high street. Meanwhile,]ustotlcamera. 1 are a couple approaching

with a similar sign saying ‘80 are we, so piss ott.’ Leningrad Cowboys Go America, the wacko ottering trom mad Finn, Aki

Kaurismaki, will be at

Glasgow GFT 22-28 Apr.

é See Film Preview page 17.

~. l‘NELPmissus, I'm stuck

in this manhole!’ ‘Aye. all right son, I'll get you out in a minute.‘ A slice ol

, _ ; Salome,courtesyol I Scottish 0pera,willbe at

the Theatre Royal. Glasgow

on 25 and 28 Apr. See Classical Music Listings : page 42.

THE LIST

SHORT

LIST

Fork calling Orson. Fork calling Orson, come in Orson. Yes, it‘s me your fruit-pie-ness. reporting back directly from Central Scotland. There’s something coming up here called a Mayfest, sir. I think it involves a lot of dancing round poles with small bells attached to yourself. A bit like a sociology degree at Berkeley. It's a strange planet, sir. Anyway here’s the rest. . .

The demise ot the Merry Macs is to be made oiticial. Forthe last two years the dynamic theatre company, which once had the nation at its feet, has Iain dormant, waiting for the trumpet blast

to be roused from its Arthurian

slumber. Sadly, the troupe is now scattered throughout Britain and all that remains are the company tunds. What to do with the residual dosh remains the linal decision. Suggestions at a recent round-table meeting at most at the co-operative included the setting up ol a ‘Catherine Lockerbie Disaster Fund’, to be donated to the Fringe show that got the best houses but the worst critical notices. Others mooted that an Irn Bru Award should be inaugurated as a robust Scottish riposte to the tizzless Perriers. A more bizarre idea was simply to dump the lot in a oner into the cap of a surprised busker. Needless to say, other more serious options are being considered. Anyone with a positive scheme likely to appeal should write to Merry Mac, c/o The List.

Not content with hosting the World Cup, the Italians are hoping for more football extravaganzas. The National Italian Singers‘ Football Association have written to the Scottish Office in the hope that ‘a football match between Italian artists and Scottish artists may be arranged.‘ Obviously Pat ‘cultural crossover” Nevin. who combines a love ofart and music with the less esotoric trade of professional footballer. would be the person to lead the Scottish team. Barbara Thompson. press wallah of the SAC. has already declined the captaincy. Currently. the Italian team are like Ron Atkinson‘s jewellery— ofan unknown quality. though the gifted gut-bucket. Pavarotti. is rumoured to play in goal for them. If that‘s the case the Scots would do well to squeeze one past him. Any Scottish ‘artists'. ofany description. interested in taking up the challenge should write to Borussia Munchen Paperback. c/o The List.

Poor old Nelson. Twenty-seven years in captivity and in the first heady months ol his release what do we do?

Invite him to suffer six hours of Jim Kerr, Tracy Chapman and Neil Young. Still, he put a brave tace on it. Though there did appear to be some contusion over who was actually going to appear. In the otticial programme iorthe event a lull page picture of Jessye Norman appeared with the unusual caption Miriam Makeba. Well, they obviously had a lot on their minds. But the mistake is even more embarrasssing as they credit someone at the back at the mag with Picture Research. Not a bad job it you can get it— ‘Yes, that's a picture. No, that's a biro’ etc.

After Letter to Brezhnev comes the sequel. Letter to Gorby. Canongate Publishing in Edinburgh have been given unprecedented access to the revered leader‘s in-tray and will publish an anthology ofGorby‘s mail just as soon as they can wade through all the correspondence. Thousands of letters have flooded in to the Kremlin from all over the world. penned by anyone from ordinary citizens right down to ex-Presidents ofthe US. ()fcourse there is a fair injection ofstrychnine into some of the pens. particularly on matters of internal policy. Though as far as his world standing is concerned it appears it could hardly be higher. Many ofhis correspondents endow him with almost messianic status. Perhaps the greatest tribute comes from the States where it would seem that redneck attitudes to him have veered from initial distrust to inviting him round for a weenie roast anytime he's passing. Unfortunately the book will not contain his replies.

Finally, it you're at the hallway house between vegetarianism and savaging meat still on the hoof, you may be interested in the Szechuan Restaurant in Tollcross. There, one of the many tine leatured dishes is 3 Vegetarian Chicken. Now, eitherthey mean there‘s very little meat on the bones or the chicken itself was led on vegetable matter only, which would hardly single it out tor special attention. Watch out tor steak salads or Edwina Curried

Eggs.

The List 20 April 3 May 1990 3