THE LIST

I CLINT In 'I portraylough old cop In a movla', Shocker. Sullry Sonia Braga. a gang-leader’s glrl, threatens the versatlla old pro's Illa ln Rookla, Eastwood’s latest lllclt. See Fllm Index page 23.

SHORT

LIST

Somewhere, deep in the recesses below The List’s offices, something stirred. A loud, prolonged groaning heralding his arrival, our Shortlist writer emerged from

beneath a pile of old copies. Shaking off his winter hangover, he sat down at a desk and promptly leapt up

again clutching his mouth.

NOWADAYS. every year has to have a theme. In 1991 it is to be Sport. Just as last year. the official focus was Glasgow. The innovative idea for this year‘s title comes courtesy of the Sports Council. who hope to use it to encourage (or frighten) Scotland‘s army of armchair sports enthusiasts into getting off their backsides and actually participating. (Leaflets explaining this aim have been duly circulated among the playing staffat Easter Road.) The Scottish Sports Council have even designated March 16 Red Ball Day. in the hope that all ball-players will come out in sympathy with Comic Reliefand kick. hit or throw a ball around that is the same colour as a clown’s neb. Now that Ally McLeod has left Ayr United. it would be nice ifthe Scottish League could restore its links with the world ofcomedy and issue red balls for the matches on that Saturday. This will not be the highlight ofthe year however: that won't arrive until May 29. when each Regional Authority in Scotland will compete to get the greatest per centage oftheir population participating in some form ofsport. So. beware the press gangs of athletes trying to haul innocent punters out ofbars on that day. Northern Ireland have opted out of the scheme because, for some unknown reason. they have accepted a similar challenge from an obscure area of Canada to see who can have the greatest number ofparticipants out on the sports field in one day.

SOME people are quicker than others at recovering from the festive shenanigans. One thriving Glasgow venue we endeavoured to contact assured us the administrator was not there. ‘Oh hold on a minute.‘ we were told. ‘He says he will be here as soon as he’s swallowed some Alka Seltzer, so can I take your number and he’ll call you back in five minutes.’

CONTACTS, as any journo worth an expense account will tell you, are

getting to the bottom ofa story. One ofour freelancers recently had a nasty experience involving both. Held up overnight whilst on assignment and slighty the worse for wear (he was guttered). Mr Mystery (we’ve changed his name from Andrew Burnet to protect his reputation) struggled back to the hotel he was staying at. After a lengthy search in the bar. he found out which way up he was and proceeded back to his room. Once there, he removed his contact lenses. but in his tired and emotional state couldn't find their holders. so. cleverly improvising. he submerged them in a handy glass of water on his bedside table. later. he woke up with a tremendous thirst and guess what? . . . Ifanyofourother readers have a similar tale. not necessarily involving Mr B. please write to us clearly marking the envelope ‘Blackmail‘.

WELL. Edinburgh may not be among the favourites to clinch the Olympics for the year 2000. but there‘s just no stopping the District Council when it comes to the provision ofsporting facilities. Their latest venture. in conjunction with Scotmid supermarkets. is to devote part ofSaughton Park to that game ofthe people Four-in-Hand Carriage Driving. Though it won‘t actually cost the Council anything. not many registered voters would go quite as far as Roger Jones. the Director of Recreation. who insisted recently that ‘In view of the present interest in Four-in-Hand Carriage Driving substantial support may be generated.‘ Have the residents of Saughton been warned about the possibility ofsubstantial numbers of supporters arriving on Saturday afternoons. chanting obscene slogans. urinating in gardens and clashing with rival carriage fans in the surrounding streets? This minor problem apart. how long have Scotmid been involved in Four-in-Hand Carriage racing? Or is this a clever scheme to train a new generation of drivers for a more environmentally sound delivery service?

very important to them. So too, is

The List 11— 24 January 1991 3