Art counterattack

In response to the miserable. bleating. bleeding-hearts letter( The List 143) from the self-styled ‘membcrs of the visual arts community" in Scotland. I forone frankly do not give a toss that a couple of posey. elitist galleries are having to shut up shop and dismantle some of their ludicrous artefacts masquerading as ‘art‘.

A briefglimpse at your Art pages might tell you what we are in danger of losing. 'I‘hey list such crowd-pullers as ‘Lfnveiling of Restored Ceramic Tile Panel' and ‘Paperwork. made from linen. cotton and banana peel'. two shows that I was not too worried about giving a bodyswerve. Is the threatened lack of opportunity to go and see such treasures as ‘plastic bags filled with water the same size and shape as the floorboards on which they are placed‘ really going to damage our quality of life so much. or is it merely going to affect the cosy livelihood of the ‘members of the visual arts community" who are getting so upset about it'.’

Perhaps more worthy of your attention is the serious threat to the future of Edinburgh's Citizens‘ Rights Office and L'nemployed Workers‘ (.‘entre. Now that could make a serious difference to people. Maybe we should hold a public meeting. although I don't think the 'I‘raverse Theatre would be the chosen venue. It‘s always full of whingeing artists.

Andy Douglas (ilen Street Edinburgh

Sticky business

No wonder Sitnon Wardle ( The List 143) thought that Vic Reeves was a charlatan he stayed in on the wrong night. The only comic worth watching. Mr Wardle. happens to be on Wednesdays not Fridays. It‘s either Roseanne or News'night you‘ve been watching and there‘s nothing surreal about them. .leremy Paxman is useless with a stick and Roseanne wouldn‘t recognise quality meat ifit hit her in the face.

Fiona McSween

()tago Street


On your bike

‘I‘oday‘s cigarette adverts may be described as works of art. but then so perhaps are Nazi propaganda posters and portraits of Saddam Hussein. More important than the medium is the message.

In this respect your current fad ad is quite revealing. It shows a group of IS motorcyclists heavily loaded and finely balanced on one bike. needing only the slightest puff to topple them to disaster. And of course. just like the smoker. the bike is heading in the wrong direction on the wrong side of the road. the inevitable life-threatening encounteronly a

88 the List 2: March 4 April 1991 V

Write to The List. Old Athenaeum Theatre. 179 Buchanan Street. Glasgow GI ZJZ. or 14 High

Street. Edinburgh EH1

lTE. The best letter next

issue will win a bottle ofJose Cuervo tequila.


matter of time away.

The particular cigarette brand offers ‘a great smoke and a great deal more’. Presumably this refers to lung cancer. heart disease or a stroke. and the consequent chimney emission on the addict‘s premature and final visit to the crematorium.

So don't be deceived by the works ofthe tobacco companies. (‘onsider the harsh reality behind their enticing images.

R.M. Atkinson Argyll 'I‘errace Edinburgh

Noto Yes

So Anderson. Bumfluff. (‘heesecake and (‘ow (Letters The List 143 ) were ‘forced' to play an extra date at the Edinburgh Playhouse in 198‘) (is that AI) or B(“.’) (ioshl There‘s not just 3M)“. but (Mill) techno-bores who are content to play safe with music that is neither subtle enough to be classical nor interesting enough to be rock.

Just because a lot of people like something doesn't make it good. If Damian Beagan had put his efforts into getting Bros. Samatha Fox or 'I‘om O‘Connor to Scotland. would he still expect The List to applaud his efforts‘.’ It‘s time he broadened his range of musical experience. I

recommend a trip to the local record library to withdraw copies of Trout Mask Replica. What's Going On and London (’alling for starters.

'1‘. Murray

Shettleston Road


One potato

Newsagents across the land are reinforcing their shelves to bear the weight of the forest of new television magazines. Which one should we buy‘.’ Which is best'.’ Why should we care when the highlights »- the best new programmes. the sharpest documentaries and plays and films that must be seen are in The List. Right'.’

Wrong. Issue after issue your selections include the banal ‘humour’ of ( hens and the slightly less offensive Roseanne» listed not once but twice. Surely the couch potato fans of such programmes know exactly when they are on.

And what about :lfter Dark 1’ We all know it's a televisual piss-up but what are they supposed to be talking about'.’ Who's on l'it' on .S'undav'.’ I wont goon further. '

It) be fair. The List does pick tip on

k some very worthwhile viewing but


there's room for improvement yet. Jason Prentice

White Street


Wheels of fortune I laying suffered in silence the pot-holes. grids and double parking on l.eith Walk for too long. I feel compelled to complain about the redesigned roundabout at the top of I-eith Walk which adds insult to injury(literally) to the cyclists of Iidinburgh. Approaching the roundabout from Broughton Street. traffic in the outer lane wishing to head down to I.eith is forced into the inner lane and. with typical lack of concern for smaller vehicles. frequently takes bicycles with it. I was very nearly run over by a bus recently. having been forced off my bike by the careless manoeuvring of another vehicle in just this situation. Is it too cynical of me to suggest that the maintenance and design of our roads might be very different if the people concerned were not addicted to the cult of the car themselves'.’ Anne Vaughan Lorne Street


The p ress‘ure group, .Sl’()l\'lf.S. campaigns for improved provision for cyclists in l-othian and can he contacted on (NI 3/3 21/4. .lleanivhile you win the bottle ofJos'e (‘uert'o tequilafor the hest letter this in u e.

Sugarand spice

My big brother the intellectual 7— he catne through today (Saturday) for the football against St Mirren in the ('up and it's not scheduled until Tuesday night. As I write. he‘s taking Roy for a walk. although Rov really didn‘t want to go for a walk 1 and had to be dragged down the stairs snarling.

While he‘s out. let‘s see what he‘s got in his kit-bag. ()ne apple. An empty Picnic wrapper. Pack of If)

J—eloths. Steal cfi (io shampoo.

Brylcreem gel. Yardley Black I.abel aftershave. Pack of 12 Iixtra Safe

condoms(I)avid ll-times-a—night

Bennie). The Independent Mag. The Bel/Jar by Sylvia Plath (35p from Barnardo‘s). A personal letter frotn Brazil (who the hell does he know in South America'.’) and a tape of

xlhha's (ireatest Hits. I guess manv

folk of his generation own Abba records. but David still actually plays the damn things.

I.ynn (i. Bennie

(ilencorse Street


l’. .S'. David ldtdll it read the letter from Rio. Well. not right to the end.

l Juanita seems like a niee girl. fig]

Printed by Scottish (‘ounty Press. Sherwood Industrial listate. Bonnyrigg. Midlothian. 'l‘el: (Bl {to} 2404.