I The only lamous Dundonians who aren't oc Thomson characters (or are they?) The Average White Band churn out creaky old funk/soul at Glasgow Cathouse and Edinburgh Venue. See Rock listings.

I Not exactly a Dream Team candidate, Woody lrom Cheers tries outhls basketball skills in a loopy comedy White Men Can't

_ Jump. See Film review.

I these people invented the Idea ot Nirvana several years ago. it seems. only lorgot to patent the concept, so they're probably quite skint (and who’s thatsquare at the back?). Help out Mudhoney at Glasgow Barrowland. See Rock listings.



‘We were in the studio for a total of three months. I was supposed to be writing, but instead I got into all the local niceties, like water-skiing and para-gliding on crack.’

The Happy Mondays’ Shaun Ryder lives out the rock ’n ’roll cliche during the recording of the band’s new LP Yes Please! in Barbados.

‘Nations which cannot feed themselves do not simply need aid. They need a severe dose of colonial rule.‘

Sir Bernard Ingham brings good old British pig-headedness to the problem of world famine.

‘Ridley is extraordinary, he really is a force of nature. Ifl were a woman, I would have made love with him.’ Actor Gerard Depardieu finds an unusual way to express his professional admiration for Ridley Scott, director of his new movie, 1492.

‘Could you put Mr Kinnock in charge of. . . a fish shop? He simply does not have the intellectual ability to do the job.’

One gets the impression that Lord Tebbit doesn ’t think Neil Kinnock would make a great EC commissioner.

‘The women I met in the past there was always some element that made me feel embarrassed or irritated when a relationship developed. Mostly it didn’t even get that far— it would be one-night stands where breakfast, ifI could face breakfast, was a torture.’

Director Roman Polanski looks back on a life ofwomanising.

The List 9— 22 October 1992 3