I Tim Curry gets the chance to inllict some serious damage on the objectionable Macauley Culkin in Home Alone 2. Admit it, you'd love to see the kid's entrails all over the sidewalk. See Film review.

I Uh-oh. who gave Oliver Reed the keys to the drinks cabinet? King Kong is on telly, and Fay Wray is playing hard to getagain. See TV listings.

I Francesco‘Ulloa revives many an old joke about pastries with his storming merengue music. Donut miss him and his band at the Edinburgh Assembly Rooms. See Folk and World preview.

I Yeah I know it looks like a European’s idea at comedy, but these Brittonioni brothers are Brits through and through. In tact our editor used to bully them mercilessly at school. Check them out at Glasgow's CCA. See Theatre preview.



‘The Queen has now lanced this dangerous boil and I think the majority of decent ordinary people will believe she has now made a proper and sensible response.‘ Lord Fawsley believes that the Queen’s decision to pay tax has Ianced the boil on her annus horribilus.

‘Bill took my virginity, my childhood, my health and my sanity. Now I have nothing left.‘

If these are the things that happened on the first four nights of Mandy Smith and Bill Wyman ’s married life, what happened on the fifth?

‘I‘m getting up at 8.30am. spending four or five hours banging stuff on a computer, finding interesting things to talk about. And. bugger me, a lot ofpeople are making love while I‘m on.‘

Radio 1 DJ Steve Wright isshocked by a survey ‘sfindings that more people carry out amorous pursuits during his show than any other radio programme.

‘I‘m not that sympathetic to famous people who complain about being famous. Ifyou can afford two weeks in the Betty Ford clinic to clean up your act, you don‘t really have any problems.‘

Bono ponders the nature ofstardom.

‘As soon as I heard those words I knew the movie was in deep shit.‘ Veteran screen writer William Goldman remembers when he was

f asked to discuss the ‘philosophical 3 implications' of A lien 3.

‘Instead of putting your hand in your

5 pocket. they‘ve already got both hands in your pockets one taking

your money. the other squeezing

your nuts.‘

Actor Mickey Rourke describes the

problem ofhangers-on.


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