‘I don’t think I can (it Ghee sandwich! by

Ten dates into the tour, and comedian and Postman Pat groupie SEAN HUGHES takes time to pen an exclusive report from the gigging front-line. Can we have a bit more volume in the monitors please . . .

here seems to be a common misconception that comedy tours are just about arriving at the venue, getting on stage aided by a microphone and abetted by a spotlight, talking for a bit and going home. The other misconception is that comedy is the new rock and roll, trashed hotel rooms, copious amounts of drugs and wild sex. Let me put the record straight; we travel in a Ford.

The last tour I did was March ’93 and once it was finished plans were put forward for this tour. Having put all that tour’s material to sleep with the last series of Sean ’3 Show, I found . myself in Melbourne in April working on new material. The themes I wanted to broach were man as animal, the tolerance of violence in society, and pizza delivery boys.

On returning, 1 set about finding my crew. Mike, the lighting designer, I s discovered residing at a Julian Cope gig. Al, a friend and full-blooded yankee, l enlisted to do sound and

broad. “(are shout ‘gee whizz’ a lot. Next to join man as ammals the gang were Simon and Maurice to the tolerance 0f do the PA. Simon has also become violence in part of the actual show, doubling as society, and stage roadie, and Maurice says ‘great pizza delivery acoustics. .frorn Side—stage. The boys., merchandismg is done by my brother Martin who IS continually asked for autographs when fans cannot be bothered to wait around for mine. Last, and least, is Mark the tour manager. His job is to pamper my every need, but nobody seems to have told him so.

Altogether, the Magnificent Seven are ready to hit comedy land.

Two weeks before the tour actually starts, I have to be nice to about 5000 regional newspaper journalists over the phone. I sometimes get the feeling it is an elaborate practical joke and it is the same person putting on different accents and asking me the same mind-numbineg dull ten questions.

Having completed a week of the tour, it is starting to take shape. So far each venue has been within driving distance from London so

B The List 1 1—24 March 1994