I Bending and stretching with the Bard: check out The Battle for the Throne, the last part of the Henry VI trilogy, staged in the dramatic surroundings of Barrhead Sports Centre. See Theatre listing for details.

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I Set in 19605 Hong Kong, Wong-liar Wai’s Days of Being Wild is moodier than the European arthouse movies that inspired it. As melancholy, stylish and romantic as you could possibly want. See Film listings for details.

I Wham! The Macbam Brothers are back and at your service, ma’am. Scotland’s favourite cult characters return for more adventures atter draining the dregs of defunct comic Electric Soup. Available now from a comic shop near you.

WORD or MOUTH

‘You don‘t get tired of being called sexy. That is unless you‘re putting on an act, like if you’re homosexual and you're pretending to be heterosexual. If you‘re homosexual, be homosexual.‘ Tom Jones talks it like he walks it.

‘l’ve always thought that it was somehow built into the homosexual nature to be subversive, to turn things upside down, to make some kind of stink. There always had to be a darker element to it all.‘

Incorrigable dressenupper Leigh Bowery gets as serious as a man who aspires to looking like a lampshade can get.

‘1 think he had a difficult life. but anyone who blows themselves away like that . . . it's a very selfish act. Particularly for those who have to mop up after you.‘

Sting uses an unfortunate choice of words to describe his reaction to Kurt Cobain is suicide.

‘After the kiss, my mail went up to about lOO letters a week. I had one weird letter from these three angry mothers who said I was a disgrace to society how could I wear ripped jeans on screen? Beth’s been raped, she‘s murdered her father. she‘s a lesbian and they’re worried because I make their kids want to wear ripped jeans?’

Anna I’riel. whose Brookside character Bet/1 Jordache is credited with thefirst pre-ii'atershed lesbian kiss on television.

‘He‘s got a big member because 90 per cent of gay men like big dicks and are not ashamed to admit it.‘

Spokesman for a company which has started tnanufluituring a batch doll called Billy who has an enormous . . . well you get the idea.

The List 2-15 December 1994 3