If the world goes out with a bang come the millennium and one perfect couple gets to escape Earth, who will get the one-way ticket? Brian Donaldson chooses six ideal pairs destined to save the human race.

Chris Evans and Anthea Turner Jarvis Cooker and Orson Welles

The Ginger Ego has already expressed his passion for the Human Smile. Just to show that Opposites really do attract. we give you having stated his desire to thump her for crimes against television. Talk the (‘ockstcr and Mr Swells. The thin white geek and about the bampot and the kettle. If you must make Turner your prize. for (‘itizcn Cake could make beautiful music together. As Evans’ sake. do it as far away from view as possible. Two careers on the ()I'Stm almost famously said: probably the best shaggers slide (we hope). Made for each other. in the world. They‘d ramrod one another to a pulp.

The Spice Girls and Oasis Pamela Anderson and Stim

Let's face it. the Spicers would be mad for it. Five A genuine meeting of the mindless. A neurtpitiyc asthma- minxes for the Mancs and the Cockney drummer - hound Chihuahua such as Ren could never satisfy the though Liam would probably want them all for lusty desires of a hep cat like Stimpy. Perhaps another himself. Morning glory? I’ll say. equally dopey cartoon character such as the blonde

Baywatch babe with the bionic bazoombas could. Happy happy. joy joyl

Dracula and John Malor Dana Scully and Paul Gascoigne

The Count’s centuries‘ worth of neck-chomping is nothing Don‘t watch the skies. Dana. Flying elbows, not saucers. compared to the eighteen years in which B 'tain has been would be your prime concern with Rangers ace Gazza. sucked dry by Tory rule. A dead politician is the perfect feast The world‘s most desirable woman (for this m0ttth)

fora rampant necrophile like our Drac, with all that blue makes it with the nation’s worst dresser (for this life). For blood set to spill upon election day, Oh, yes, The X-Filr’s’s sceptical Scully. the uncouth is out there.

The List 7-20 Feb I997 13