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TV review

Out Of Hours BBC 1, Wed 20 May, 9.30pm.

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Diamond geezer: Dominic West in . Out Of Hours

The credits sequence of Out Of Hours, the BBC’s latest medical drama series is eerily similar to Casualty, but that’s where comparisons cease. Out 0/ Hours is a less gritty and more stylised depiction of the lives and loves of rnedrcs in this instance those who deputise for family doctors when they are off duty. The cast includes former soap stars Lindsey Coulson (Carol Jackson in EastErrders) and John

Soapbox

Gruesome twosomes lead to heartbreak, revelation and runaway horses in Soapland.

Soaps thrivc~ on the mismatched couple who shouldn’t be together 7 such as the hilariously awful Irene and Terry in EastEnders, suited only in that no-one else would have either of 'em.

Their wedding came to an abrupt halt

\.-~.hen the bridegroom turned out to

be, oops, already hitched. There were

. several credibility stretches. why does

Simon and Tiffany’s rnrrrn look absolutely nothing like either of her children7 How on Earth did Walford’s biggest waster manage to convrnce two women to marry lirrn7 And where did Irene get that dress7

Emmerdale's big wedding went off a l.ttle rrrore srrrootlrly, although the appeal of tlrrs soap rs unfathomable. A sort of spiritual heir to Crossroads, it’s populated by cartoonrsh yokels, ghastly posh horsey types and the incomprehensible, astoundrngly-

104 THE lIST III )8 May I998

Aisle be damned: Irene and Terry in EastEnders

McArdle (Brooks/de’s Billy Corkhrll), along wrth up-and-comrng young actor, Dominic West,

According to West, who plays Dr Paul Featherstone, the filming got every bit as close to the bone as grisly episodes of Casualty. ’I nearly passed out,’ he remarks of one particularly gruesome scene. 'I thought I had really cut off his fingers. All the time we had been rehearsing the scene, this actor had been saying "You're very close to my fingers, Dominic. I can feel the knife!” And when we went for the real scene and the knife cut in, all I could see was this bloody sturrrp. It was a prosthesis fastened to the glove, but it didn’t half look real! I was c’onvrnced that I had really cut off his fingers urrtrl he started laughing.’

West's acting rescrme includes the boat-race film True Blue and Spr'cewor/d: The Movie. Next up is the juicy part of Lysander in A Midsummer Night’s Dream alongside Kevrn Kline, Michelle Pfeiffer, Anna Fuel and Ally McBeal star, Calista Flockhart ’Kevrn is a man I like very much,’ he adrnrts ’Off the screen as well as on he is a very funny man. While we were filming one scene where he clrdn’t have to appear in front of the camera, he turned up and spent all day keeping us

entertained. It was a very generous thing to do.’ (Brian Donaldson)

sideburned Seth Armstrong

In last week's one-hour ’spec ral’, the wedding of superbrtc h Krrn provrded the foc us for a series of inc reasingly fatuous events Two men prac tised the samba, purer so that someone could catch them and rump to conc lusrons, the Drngles trrecl to steal a horse, after a post-nuptial roll in the hay, Krrrr’s new husband revealed lre’s Just lost their fortune Meanwhile the horse ate the wedding cake Had it left a little sometlrrng behind, it would have been fair comment

Even sillier was Jack Duc kworth's bizarre Lusty Jack act in Coronation Street. Only Vera could be daft enough to believe his pretence that he’d regressed to a past life as a 17th century rogue, a cross between long John Silver and Cap'n Birdseye lhe whole story seemed left over from a Carry On frlrn, but clrd at least provrde a cheering counterbalance to poor Zoe's breakdown She and the lovely Ashley are a nrrsmatc hed couple all right, but heading for tragedy, not laughs (Andrea Mullaney)

Gallic ill-bred: Antoine de Caunes with Katie Boyle in A Song For Eurotrash

TV REVIEW Channel

hopping

The Germans have long had strained relations With the Poles Yet when Gurldo Horn and his support band The Orthopaedic Stockings had the ternerrty to slide up, and then down, and then back up a greased one during The Eurovision Song Contest (BBCI), it raised serious doubts over the traditional View that those nasty Aryans lack any inkling of humour

Of course, havrng a strong sense of fun and an ability to suspend taste are the key vrewrng requirements of the (tilt which made househoch names out of the likes of Abba, Sandi and Dana. Qurte What the latter would make of this year’s Victor, Dana International, is anybody's guess, but the Israeli transsexual very nearly had our Master of lronres, Terry Wogan and this year's sidechick Ulrika Jonssorr speechless Will people please cease grvrng this woman work?

While the nations across the continent waited for the vote-tottrng, we were treated to a celebration of Britain's musical heritage courtesy of great UK pop idols Vanessa MaeI Patti Boulaye' Some Blokes With Spears' allawrng Ulrika rust about enough trrne to slip out of her cack- coloured leatherette outfit and into a slinkier /ebra-type affair Light hours later and it was clear that Britain's lmaanr had lost out and that . Mossacl would K have a bit of extra security work to do next summer

As Antoine de Caunes, presenter of the surprisingly entertaining A Song For Eurotrash (Channel 4) informed us, the last trrne Israel lard on the spread, Germany was represented by an act sensitively entitled (renghrs Khan lhey Jackbooted their way through sorrre clrtty about swrmming in vodka and an international incident was Just about avoided Universal outrage also erupted on discovering that Katie Boyle once fronted the event wrthout a strtclr of underwear underneath her ballgown

Another successful Eurotras'h trtbrt was the footage of a Norwegian Stars In Their Eyes with a Jahn Tergen lookalike. Jahn rs the man who wakes tip screaming wrth the phrase ’nul pornts‘ ringing in his tone-deaf ears after his literally pointless I978 performance. Now Teigen spends many a free hour acupuncturrng himself with toothpicks. But then, maybe this contest simply brings out the worst in everyone. What else can explain Terry Hall's claim that the lyrics to Dana's ’All Kinds Of Everythrng' rrvalled anything in the Leonard Cohen canon7 Hall dueted the song wrth Sinead O'Connor, Edwyn Collins performed 1975 Dutch wrnner ’Drng A Dong’, Bananararna destroyed 'Waterloo', Sacha Distel serenaded Sarah Dubstar and Kenickie revamped Brotherhood Of Man's ode to paedophilia ‘Save All Your Kisses For Me' Finally, Shane McGowan slcrrred and belclred his way through ‘What's Another Year.’ Now that's irony,

Even Bontempi brgshot Mr John Shuttleworth got in on the act wrth Europigeon (BBCZ), his doomed attempt to represent the UK wrth the rnovrng ballad 'Prgeons In Flight'. Havrng failed in his audacious bid, Sheffreld’s answer to Gina (3 attempted to entice the aforerrrentroned Jahn Tregen out of retrrernent wrth half a lager and the chance to rekindle his career by perforrnrng the number for Norway

Caunes, presenter of the surgisrésirrgiy entertaining A Song For umfrash informed us that the last ime tsrael laid on the spread, Germany was represented by an act sensitively entitled Genghis Khan.

Slruttleworth's mood darkened and his mind altered when Tregen screeched and barked his song to bloody death, Unfortunately, this was the only belly laugh The show ended on a low note in a nightmare sequence With Johnny Logan and Katrina from the Waves helping out Shutts With the song Most disturbing of all though, was the hinted suggestion of rnarrtal drsharrnony Could agent and impressarro Ken Worthington be rogerrng John's lovely wrfe Mary7 Now that’s rust not funny (Brian Donaldson)