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20 THE US‘I’ 24 Sep—8 Oct 1998


Start scribbling, because the best letter each issue wins a bottle of Smirnoff Blue

Terms of abuse

Why is America so keen to throw itself into political and, who knows, economic CllSlS by maybe impeaching and getting rid of Clinton as President? His predecessors have done far more to tarnish the reputation of the office than he did by having a fling with the sexual equivalent of an autograph hunter.

Think of it this way O‘i'erthrow a democratically elected government in Central America or tell fibs abOiit a blow—Job7 Sell arms to Iran in exchange for the release of hostages , or cover up a bit of oral excnement7 What really exemplifies abuse of power7

Do the lives of people iii foreign countries count less than a spot of sperm on a dress? Given the fact that Reagan got away With his shady dealings, but Clinton looks likely to be sacrificed to America's great (hyDOCFIilCd!) moral crusade, then thr- answer would appear to be "yes' Christopher Jacobs Glasgow

Dillon moron

Matt Dillon must be maddm than a goat dipped in LSD to prefer h‘ariali Carey to Cameron Diaz Cameron is naturally gorge0us, likes her ale and is totally cool wrth it, while bug-eyed Carey looks like some kind of spat e alien and makes 'music' which is so bland it makes Celine Dion sound like Cannibal Corpse

l'd have understood if Matt had strayed while he was filming l‘v’i/d Things” - way With Neve Campbell and Denise Richards Without feeling tempted but Mariah Carey7 This is a woman who has sold 80 million records and claims not to feel financially secure She's not going to settle for two pints of lager and a yindaloo down the local Indian on a Friday night, now is she7

But Cameron's another matter I


few men could shoot a three-

Gomez: Mercury rising stars

reckon she’d Jump at the chance of the curry and inSist on paying for her half of the pakora starter. Now that’s a

real woman.

Dave Hayes

: Cumbernauld

Bring it on down

If Gomez deserved to wm this year’s MerCtiry Prize, then larvrs Cocker is really a Satan-worshipping crack slave and Michael Jackson deserves to get a post in pie-nursery tjhild care.

I thought the prize was supposed to be for originality and exCiting new talent. Some of the preVious winners

such as Roni Size, Suede, Portishead Q and Primal Scream may not be everyone's Cup of tea, but they all

produced albums that challenged the

conventions of their genres and have

gone on to stand the test of time. Gomez have merely turned into a Tom

Wait’s Howlin' Wolf Ol' Grizzle Pants

hybrid before they're even out of short trousers Why reward people for sounding as though they garole glass and want to be octogenarian delta blues iiien before their halls have dropped7 There is nothing original about it, if they

' wore silly hats on stage audiences would

iiiistake them for a tribute band, Massive Attack wuz robbed

Pete D


Editor Okay, I’ve got to agree about Massive Attack, so send us in your fu/i' name, Pete, and we’// send you the Smirnoff Blue

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Miller Pilsner tlssue 342) P Piitthard (Edinburgh) Runners-up WT Allan lCm-i/denheathl, l McCulloth (Edlllbllrflil‘, DaVid McPherson (Glasgow‘i