Flower Show

Saying it With flowers was once the preserve of traditionalists when it came to art but, these days, floral art no longer simply means a still life of a bunch of petunias. Flower Show has thirteen budding artists, including gerbera- loving Anya Gallaccio and stall-maker Michael Landy, while lvlat Collishaw has overlaid portraits of prostitutes with flowers and fruit (pictured here is Transparency No. 7). Flower power is back.

F/ower Show is at the Fruitmarket Ga/lery, Edinburgh, Sat 20 Nov—Sat 75 jan.

Lara Croft

Lara Croft female icon, or tragic victim of mammary excess? Dave Stewart claims the former and has enlisted ’lookalike' (ie. dark-haired model) Rhona lvlitra to make a concept album about it. But anyone With breasts knows the truth. Lara puts on a good show for the pixel-twiddlers, but when she's off- duty, she’s crippled by backache, plagued by stretchmarks and bankrupted by specialist bra manufacturers. So despite the hype, be kind to her. She’s a woman in need of much support.

Tomb Raider: The Last Reve/ation is released by Eidos on P/ayS ta tion/PC (£44.99/f 39. 99) on Fri 26 Nov; Fema/e Icon is released on X/// Bis Records on Mon 29 Nov.


6 THE HST l8 Nov—2 Dec 1999

Apparently I’m going up in the world. The signs are not immediately ObVIOUS. I haven't taken to gueue jumping. abseiiing from my Discovery to the pavement, inherent SuperCiliousness or accessing child porn sites No, I've made the far simpler move to a different postcode.

Havmg lived in London fOr a mercifully brief perzod, | Witnessed at first hand the scourge of postcode snobbery. This disease has swarmed in on the oacks of the rats of regeneration that arrived on the gooo ship progress, and its

abuses her postcode


the most obvious candidates for the G12 Guardian Angels sclneme given Our predilection fOr petty vandalism and loosely threatening b€haVlOUl. But it would seem that the ciVilising influence of a leafy avenue has managed to instill Within us sOme sense of CIVIC responsibility The reason for this rallying call? Well, it WOuld appear that the Hyndland Church Hall is to be the next Victim of 'property redevelopment'. Some bright spark on commission has noticed that, while the neigthuring area's house prices WOuld have bOugnt you all of Dumbartonsnire fOur years ago, there’s one 'ittie hub of Hyndland that iSn't bringing in the bucks Cue the chequebooks

Glasgow has a tradition of taking buildings that most cities would include on their tourist route and knocking

them down.

poison is spreading into the heart of Glasgow. Like Hale and Pace, it must be stopped at all costs. One of the reasons I first chose to move to Glasgow was because it was a City which knew its own mind and wasn’t going to take any of that M25 bUHShlI. I'm not saying I was drawn to the COSy image of ragamuffins With rickets and dysentery frolicking in the open sewers while Mammy scrubbed in the steamie, That was what I was hoping to leave behind in Oidham (home of the tubular bandage, don’t yOu know),

The recent move to Hyndland went Surprisingly smoothly there’s a lot to be said for clear labelling and a man With a van. It was only once I raised my head above the fruit boxes and newspaper that the subtle climate-like shift began to make itself noticeable. Cycle lanes replaced known gang safe zones. The graffiti no longer enticed us to engage in sexual relations With the Queen, but urged us to go out there and Free Tibet. The softness underfoot in the playgrounds was merely kiddie-friendly tarmac, rather than various types of effluwa. I had entered the highlife zone, where cabbies want bigger tips and ramraiding the bowling club is not an Option.

Now, on first glimpse, me and my comrades may not seem

Glasgow has a tradition of taking buildings that most cities would include on their tOurist route and knocking them down. The famous club from Trainspotting? Level it. George Hotef? How many Top Shops can we fit n that space? A piddling church hall With more column inches to its name than Michaeé Barrymore doesn't get a look in, deSpite the fact that Brit Award-winning band Belle & Sebastian rehearse in its well appomted and airy rooms.

Glasgow is slow'y being homogenised, pedestrianised and sanitiseo into conformity. We are becoming a McCity. A glaCier-clean shadow of our former selves, shiny happy Victims of our own ambition, And it must stop, even if that means a halt to the seemingly unstoppable tide of airbrushed apartments With all the character of a Gail Porter/mashed potato hybrid. Let the riff raff back in, like designer outlets and over—priced style bars, we belong here too. It’s time to reclaim What was once Ours. GOing down, anyone?

Gill Mills co-presents Radio 1's Evening Session opt-out, Session In Scotland, every Thu, 8-10pm; co-hosts The Loafers on BBC Choice, Tue-Fri, 10pm; and presents Hot Pursuits on BBC Knowledge, Radio Scotland.