American Beauty Problem: a loveless marriage in suburbia. Cure: lusting after your daughter's nubile friend and scoring dope off the kid next door. Kevin Spacey's portrayal of male mid-life crisis is being acclaimed as the best work of his fine career. Not one for snogging in the back row. perhaps. but the first six couples to pre-book tickets for the main evening Valentine's Day screening at Edinburgh's Cameo cinema will receive film merchandise and a free drink. Selected release across Scotland.


Horses, Horses Coming In In All Directions When a show promises to 'explore the whole joyous mess we call relationships and the inescapability of the procreative urge'. you know there's not going to be wedding bells in the air. Instead. expect a clash between rock gig and theatre performance as actors and drummers meet head on. Glasgow: TheArehes. Thu lO—Sar I 2 Feb, Mon l4-Sa! 19 Feb. 8pm.


Death In Vegas ‘Dirge'. 'Soul Auctioneer'. ‘Dead Elvis'. ‘Rekkit'. Song titles like this won’t be the forerunners when it comes to choosing the first dance at your wedding. Richard Fearless and Tim Holmes are a truly atmospheric live presence: it‘s dark. it‘s menacing and.

Valentine's Day 2000 - it could be the most important date

Love is in the air, but you need to heighten the mood in order

romance into a reality. In The List's regular listing sections, you'll hundreds of choices of where to go on the day itself (and on the

preceding weekend). Here, however, are some suggestions to help you sweep your loved one off their feet - and a few alternatives for the anti- romantics among you. Words: Alan Morrison

despite the Vegas connection. it’s not Frank singing ‘Songs For Swinging Lovers'. Glasgow: The Arches. Sun I 3 Feb. 9pm.

The 13th Warrior As a broad generalisation. her interest might flicker at

the thought ofAntonio Banderas. while

he's drawn in by the thought of a John (Die Hard) McTiernan action epic. lt has to be said. however. that a bunch of Vikings on a rape-and-pillage tour isn‘t recommended for cosy evenings at the fireside. Of course. video can be the ultimate accessory for anti-romance: get two machines. two TVs. two separate rooms and indulge your individual. obsessive tastes. The entire Star Trek back

- catalogue against a compilation of George

Clooney's best moments in ER? Great football moments against Hollywood tear- jerking classics? For the individual male viewer. the options are endless. although it might prove difficult to reach up to the top shelf if you’ve already over-exercised your right arm. The 13!]: Warrior is released for rental on Mon I 4 Feb.


Valentine's Day The brutal irony

generated between the title and the book‘s cover - a couple of determined 17th century women hacking the head off a bearded male carries through this collection of female revenge stories from


‘Roses are red. violets are blue Give me your order and I’// see whorl can do'


22 Argyle Place. Marchmont tel: 0131 477 2923 email: flowers@mhiggins.fsbusiness.co.uk

the likes of Fay Weldon. Agatha ('hristie and Joyce Carol ()ates. ‘Vengcancc is mine.‘ saith the Lady. with no holds barred. The recently spurned will find inspiration aplenty. Published by Duek Editions on Mon [4 Feb. prlt‘erl £9.99.


Subcircus: Sixty Second l.ove Affair Look. for some people. ()0 seconds would be a rare achievement. But if that‘s all you can offer as long-term commitment in the modern age. then maybe this should he

Broken hearts:

.. ' .1 at“ . Death In Vegas.

(from left): v f

Quake III. - American h


Valentine's Day Alina TIMme [Ilia u

the soundtrack to your life. Released hv lie/lo on Mon [4 Feb.

Computer Games

Quake III Arena No longer is computer gaming a solitary endeavour. Link up machines via the Internet. choose your weapons carefully. and blast each other to bits in virtual reality. Multiplayer mode is sure to clear the air of all those hoyl'riend/ girlfriend niggles. xil'tll/(lbll’fur PC' from all eompuler games outlets. [)r'lt‘t‘tl around [29.99.

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3—17 Feb 2000 THE LIST 109