I Tackno at Club Mercado. 10.30pm-3am. £4—£6. 26 Mar. Monthly. lt’s a soap opera theme tonight as Tackno poses badly in front of long drawn out camera pans, wears too high shoulder pads and acts more wooden than my grandpa’s fake leg. As always, it’ll be a chance for the revellers to make the most of their cheesy chance of fame.

I Taste at Wilkie House. 11pm—3am. £8 (£6). Weekly. It’s a non-stop ride of hands in the air action when nutters Fisher and Price get up behind the decks in the main room for some house, odd bits of electro and other bits and pieces. The punters are always up for a brilliant night, making this one of the best clubs in the capital, year in, year out. The back room is slick garage and US house heaven with Stuart Barrie and Martin Valentine.

I Tokyo Blue at Gaia. 9pm—3am. £3 (£2). Weekly. Craig Burger Queen and select guests will be laying on glam and sexy house while Tim Cuban Brother will be mm in the upstairs bar.

I Vibe at The Liquid Room. 10pm—3am. £4 (£3). Weekly. Dancehall, R&B and old skool hip hop from the Mad Ambassador and Archie.

Chart & party

I The Ark at The Ark. 10pm—3am. £4 (£2). Weekly. With supercheap bevvy, you might want to take Monday off.

I Chocolate Sundae at Revolution. 10pm-3am. £2—£5. Weekly. Soulful house and disco dubs.

I Loca at Loca. 10pm—3am. Free. Weekly. A commercial mix of chart, dance and disco.

I Mad Sundays at The Attic. 8pm—5am. £3 (£2). Weekly. Chart and classic disco. I Replay at Eros/Elite. 9pm-3am. £2 (£1) before 11pm; £3 (£2) before midnight; £4 (£3) after. Replay sees the hits of the 705 and 805, er, replayed while the kids in Meltdown relax to chart and countdown anthems.

I The Subway West End at The Subway West End. 4pm—3am. £1. Weekly. See Fri.

EDINBURGH MONDAYS Pro-club

I Baracoa at Baracoa. 9pm—1am. Free. Weekly. Easy listening heaven with Deke Patton.

Club

I C.C. Blooms at C.C. Blooms. 11pm—3am. Free. Weekly. Gay, kitsch and all things fab at this popular bar and disco. I Dusty Rhodes at The Cocteau Lounge. 11pm—3am. Free. Weekly. Mr Todd (Higher Ground) playing jazz and funk, Latin, world and smooth classics.

I Jam Sessions at Bar Nego (Negociants). 8pm—3am. Free. Weekly. The specific type of music ‘jammed’ at this session is jazz.

I The Profezzionals at P0 Na Na. 11pm—3am. Free. Weekly. DJ Roddy and Jason offer a first class mix of 805, filthy disco and house.

I Rarefaction 2000 at Jazz Joint. 10pm-3am. £4 (£3). Weekly. Live drum & bass action driven by Paul Harrison on keyboards, supported by Stuart Brown on drums and Martin Kershaw giving it some on sax.

Chart & party

I The Ark at The Ark. 10pm-3am. £4 (£2). Weekly. Charty, cheesy and cheerful. I Flare at Why Not? 10pm—3am. £4 (£3 if you’re wearing flares). 13 Mar. Fortnightly. Chart and retro hits at this bell-bottomed theme night.

I Loca at Loca. 8pm—3am. Free entry before 11pm; £2 before 1am; £4 after. Weekly. A commercial mix of chart, dance and disco.

I Skool Disco at The Ark. 10pm—3am. £4 (£2). Weekly. All your favourites from the school disco collection.

I The Subway West End at The Subway West End. 4pm—3am. £1. Weekly. See Fri. I Trainspotter at The Subway. 10pm-3am. £1 (free for students with matriculation card). Weekly. A mix of indie and dance.

I Wacky at Why Not? 10pm—3am. £1-£5. 21 Feb. Fortnightly. Chan and party.

EDINBURGH TUESDAYS Pro-club

I Salsa Con Sabor at Baracoa. lOpm—lam. Free. Weekly. DJ Hector and Latin heaven.

Club

I C.C. Blooms at C.C. Blooms. 11pm—3am. Free. Weekly. Gay bar and disco, tonight with 605, 705 and 805 tunes.

I Diskographaz at Jazz Joint. 9.30pm—3am. £3. Weekly. The best of Latin, soul, hip hop and funk played by Edinburgh’s to DJs.

I Future Shoc at The Cocteau Lounge. 11pm—3am. Free. Weekly. Simmone Black plays deep garage and soulful grooves.

I Live 'N' Loud at Bar Nego (Negociants). 8pm—3am. Free. Weekly. Local rock and indie bands shake the foundations of this basement club.

I Knights Of The Round Table at Po Na Na. 11pm-3am. Free. Weekly. Sir Dance-A-Lot holds the holy grail of smooth grooves and funky moves.

I Motherfunk at The Venue. 11pm-3am. Free. Weekly. Exceptionally popular rare groove, soul and funk night hosted by Gino and Fryer.

Chart & party

I Loca at Loca. 8pm-3am. Free entry before 11pm; £2 before 1am; £4 after. Weekly. A commercial mix of chart, dance and disco.

I Skool Disco at The Ark. 10pm—3am. £tbc. Weekly. All your favourites from the school disco collection.

I The Subway West End at The Subway West End. 4pm-3am. £1. Weekly. See Fri.

EDINBURGH WEDNESDAYS Pro-club

I Baracoa at Baracoa. 9pm—1am. Free. Weekly. North African and Asian beats plus dance classes.

I Freeform at The Cocteau Lounge. 11pm—3am. Free. Weekly. Lyley (Scratch) plays funk, soul, jazz, hip hop and other lost classics.

I Made In Iguana at Iguana. 9pm—1am. Free. Weekly. Colin Millar (Headspin) and Adam Bray lay on a superb mix of breaks and beats from hip hop to house, nu skool breaks to drum & bass.

I The Merry Pranksters

at The Meadows Bar. 9pm-1am.

Free. Weekly. Noodles, Brains and Lady Teri take you into the future

beat dimension with beats and

breaks.

listings CLUBS

I Booya at Bar Nego (Negociants). 8pm-3am. Free. Weekly. A new night going live in the capital with DJs Nasty P and Archie, playing hip hop and R&B.

I C.C. Blooms at C.C. Blooms. 11pm—3am. Free. Weekly. Very popular gay bar and disco.

I Free Form at E2K. 11pm—3am. Free. Weekly. Lyley of Scratch fame hosts this weekly hip ho and funk do.

I Freester ransmission at Studio 24. 10.30pm-3am. £3. Weekly. Aiming to bring you the finest techno, drum & bass, hip hop, big beat and experimental dance. Half the profits are going towards Trident Ploughshares 2000, an organisation keen on smashing (with hammers) anything connected with the construction and running of Trident nuclear submarines. I Jan Singers' Night at Jazz Joint. 10pm—3am. £4 (£3). Weekly. Hosted by Cathie Rae and Subi Coleman, this is a regular dose of supreme vocal talent. DJ Tinku provides the turntable talent.

I Kero-Scene at Studio 24. llpm—3am. £1.50. Weekly. Alternative night playing goth, industrial, metal and extreme. ‘Where every night is a corpse paint night.’

I Out 2 Lunch at P0 Na Na. 11pm—3am. Free. Weekly. DJ Harry Lets Go puts the eclectic into electric.

Chartdtparty

I Faux Paux at Why Not? 10pm—3am. £5. 15 Mar. Fortnightly. Student night with live music, DJs and drinks promos. I Hump at The Ark. 9pm—3am. £2. Weekly. Student club with appropriate music and drinks promos.

I Loca at Loca. 8pm—5am. Free entry before 11pm; £2 11pm—1am; £4 after. Week] .A mix of chart, dance and disco. I Midweek Mayhem at The Liquid Room. 10.30pm—3am. Free with matric card before 12.30am; £2 otherwise. Weekly. Much cheapness of drink, obviously aimed at the students among

us.

I Shark at Eros/Elite. 9pm—3am. £3 (£2) before 11pm; £4 (£3) after. Weekly. An inde ndent student night.

I Iagraah at Revolution. 10pm—3am. £4 (£3). Weekly. Lots of drink promos to get the students acting, well, like drunk students.

clubs

VENUES

I Air Organic 36 Kelvingrove Street,

564 5201.

I Alasksa 142 Bath Lane, 248 1777.

I The Apartment 23 Royal Exchange Square, 221 7808.

I Archaos 25 Queen Street, 204 3189.

I The Arches Midland Street (off Jamaica Street), 221 4001.

I The Bedsit 1 Park Drive,339 0432.

I Bennet's 80 Glassford Street, 552 5761. I Bonkers Hope St, 248 5884.

I Brel 39 Ashton Lane, 342 4966.

I Budda 142 St Vincent Street, 221 5660. I Caledonian University Student Union (Asylum) 70 Cowcaddens Road, 332 0681.

I The Cathouse 15 Union Street, 248 6606.

I Cleopatra‘s 508 Great Western Road, Kelvinbridge, 334 0560.

I Club Budda 142 St Vincent St, 221 2213.

I Cul De Sac Ashton Lane, 334 8899.

I Eat Drink Man Woman 34—44 King St, 552 9227.

I Firebird 1321 Argyle Street, 334 0594. I Fury Murry’s 96 Maxwell Street,

221 6511.

I The Garage 490 Sauchiehall Street, 332 1120.

I Glasgow School of Art 167 Renfrew Street, 332 0691.

I Glasgow University Union 32 University Avenue, 339 8697.

I 92 474 Sauchiehall St (behind the Garage), 353 3111.

I Havana 50 Hope Street, 248 4466.

I Life (basement of Corinthian), 191 Ingram Street, 552 1101.

I The Living Room 5 Byers Road, 339 8511.

I Nice 'n' Sleazy 421 Sauchiehall Street, 333 9637.

I Planet Peach 34 Queen Street, 226 8990.

I Polo Lounge 84 Wilson Street,

553 1221.

I Queen Margaret Student Union 22 University Gardens, 339 9784.

I Reds, 375 Sauchiehall Street, 331 1635. I Rocksy's Basement 40 New Sneddon Street, Paisley, 552 5791.

I Scaramouche Bar, 140 Elderslie St, Charing X, 572 0828.

I The Shed 26 Langside Avenue, 649

9473.

I Spy Bar Bath Street, 221 7711.

I Strawberry Fields 56 Oswald Street, 221 7871.

I The Studio, 1084 South St, Scotstoun, 401 1750.

I Sub Club 22 Jamaica Street, 248 4600. I The Temple 193 Pitt St, 332 7522.

I 13th Note 260 Clyde Street, 243 2177 I Trash 197 Pitt Street, 572 3372.

I The Tunnel 84 Mitchell Street, 204 1000.

I Variety Bar 4OISauchiehall Street, 332 4449.

I The Velvet Rooms Sauchiehall Street, 332 0755.

I The Woodside Social Club 329 North Woodside Road. 337 1643.

I Yang 33 Queen Street. 248 8484.

EDINBURGH

I The Ark 3 Semple Street, 229 7733.

I The Art College Lauriston Place, 220 3234.

I The Attic Dyer’s Close, Cowgate, 225 8382.

I The Basement Broughton Street, 557 0097.

I La Belle Angele 11 Hasties Close, 225 7536.

I The Bongo Club 14 New Street, 556 5204.

I Cafe Graffiti Mansfield Place Church (bottom of Broughton Street), 557 8003. I Catwalk Broughton Street, 225 5583. I Cavendish West Tollcross, 228 3252. I C.C. Blooms 23—24 Greenside Place, 556 9331.

I The Citrus Grindlay Street, 622 7086. I The City Cafe Blair Street, 220 0125. I The Cocteau Lounge (EZK), Picardy Place (entrance through The Outhouse Gardens, Broughton Street Lane, 478 7434.

I EZK Picardy Place, 478 7434.

I eh‘l 197 High Street, 220 5277.

I Eros/Elite Fountainpark, Dundee Street, 228 1661.

I Gaia King Stables Road, 229 7986. I Jazz Joint Henry’s Cellar Bar, Morrison Street, 221 1288.

I The Liquid Room 9c Victoria Street, 225 2564.

I Loco 235 Cowgate, 225 5413.

I The Meadow Bar Buccleuch Street, 622 7680.

I Club Mercado 36—39 Market Street, 226 4224.

I Bar Nego at Negociants Lothian Street, 225 6313.

I Noa 7 Queensferry Street Lane, 226 6828.

I Oxygen 3-5 Infirmary Street, 557 9997.

I Peppermint Lounge Blair Street, 622 6811.

I Pivo 2—6 Calton Road, 557 2925.

I Po Na Na 26 Frederick Street, 226 2224.

I The Potterrow Bristo Square, 650 9195.

I Revolution 31 Lothian Road, 229 7670. I Studio 24 Calton Road, 558 3758.

I The Subway Cowgate, 225 6766.

I The Subway West End Lothian Road, 229 9197.

I The Vaults 15—17 Niddrie Street, 558 9052.

I The Venue Calton Road, 557 3073.

I The Wee Red Bar Edinburgh College Of Art, Lauriston Place, 229 1442.

I Why Not? 14 George Street, 624 8311.

I Wilkie House Cowgate, 225 2935.

16—30 Mar 2000 THEM"