Advertisement Tina McTattler at the Arches party...

The water has barely dried on wee Rocco's head and the vacuuming completed at Skibo Castle and along comes another invitation to a glittery affair. Obviously, being one of Scotland's top gossip columnists, I, Tina McTattIer, get invited to all the best parties, and let me just say, the Arches launch party on Thursday 11 January was exactly that - one of those banging parties!

Initially I couldn't understand what all the fuss was about; throwing a party to launch refurbished premises. I mean, I've bought a few three-piece suites in my day, but I've never invited the arts world to come and view them! However, eat my low-fat hat I did, this was no flat-pack furniture affair, this was the real McCoy! A £4m facelift courtesy of a Lottery award from the Scottish Arts Council (£3.5m), topped up with contributions from Glasgow City Council (£80,000), Railtrack Scotland (£350,000) and some self-generated revenue have brought the Arches into a new stage of development.

Now, I'm not saying I never use the front door and I'm definitely not saying that I always exit via the tradesman's entrance when it comes to leaving certain establishments - this I want to make perfectly clear as l gush and obsess about the lovely new entrance on Argyle Street that enables you to enter the

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catacombs of the Arches. As those of you who have visited the Arches before will know, it is possible to walk past their old Midland Street entrance and not even realise it is there. Anyway, arriving at 7pm (fashionably on time) I was greeted at the new box office, guided through the beautiful new exhibition space and into the stunning new cafe/bar where l was handed a drink, and so set off in search of some hot gossip.

What can I say? It was like a school reunion! Over 1,600 friends, staff and past performers all having what can only be described as a whale of a time throughout the entire building! There were various walkabout performances and tongue-in-cheek gags (yes, I did get taken in by the fake bouncers on arrival), but one of the highlights for me was the performance of

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