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THRILLER SORTED (18) 98 mins 000

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This Will certainly interest anyone who watched the TV series Movie Virgins. which followed two British filmmakers as they tried to get their first film off the ground. One of these movies was Alex Joi ('5; Sorted. a thriller set iii London's ciubland. Matthew Rhys is trying to find out how his brother died: Jason Donovan plays a benevolent transvestite; Tim Vincent the dead brother: Tim Curry yet another pantomiriie vrllain, even Kelly Brook crops up as a drugs casualty. However, it's a lot better than the sum of its parts. the club scenes are incredibly realistic and for some reason this ludicrous piece of nonsense is pretty watchable. (Metrodome rental: $719.99 on DVD) (Henry Northmore)

THRILLER SHAFT (18) 95 mins .00

Not so much revrved as followuig in the family line. Samuel L Jackson is young John Shaft. nephew of Richard Roundtree's bad ass 'tec from the 70s. Stylish as hell and with a cache of cracking one-liners. Shaft retooled for the noughties is a fiery. but caring rozzer who goes outside the law to apprehend a yuppie murderer played in true AmerCian Psycho style by Christian Bale. Knowrng postmodern smirks aside - Roundtree playing ol' Shaft wrth lovelies on both arms - lil' John's adventures are a little flat and predictable and only Jackson's acerbic performance lifts this out of straight to Video hell.

(R2iréii"oti“‘. rental: 5 19.99071 D‘l/D Mark


COMED/ lHRl'..l FR SNATCH (18) 99 mins .00

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follow-up to Lock. Stock: And Two Smoking Barre/s. Bang out of order as it 'api’iens. 'cause. alright Snatc/r is about anuver caper gone pear-shaped. wiv a bunch of gee/ers playing a mugs iame over some stolen diamonds. but. all said and done. it's a right larf. Camerawork's bonkers, you can't understand a bleedin’ word Brad Pitt's thieVing pikey says and you'd come up blank if Benecio Del Toro’s kosha stones smuggler whispered in your shell-like. but Alan Ford's gangster Brick Tori and Mike Reid's dodgy Doug the Head make thernselfs understood. And Vinnie Jones? Well, he Just smacks wankers don't he? (Columbia Eff/1.99) (Miles Fielder)

SCI-Fl ANIMATION TITAN A.E. (PG) 92 mins 0..

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Here's an animated antidote to Disney's Singing animals and Pixar's Cute bugs. co- directOrs Don Bluth and Gary Oldman's action- packed space opera. By the year 3928 Earth has been destroyed by an alien race of pure energy beings known as the Drei. The remnants of the human race are scattered across the galaxies. so many refugees. While the Dre] strive for human extinction. a motley crew of adventurers including yOung buck Cale iv0iced by Matt Damoni. mercenary Korso (Bill Pullmani and lithe Akima (Drew Barrymore) which trio approximates

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'..'.’; Ifrfl":tli’lti€333 cccas-onaliy gar. T'V: overall sophistication 0" the 'iiages is zen, {ll‘ipffszSIL/f: check t'ie gcbsrnacking ice asteroids seguence The Jumping rock soundtrack is naff and the plotting S;iri7i_)listir:. but the xenophobia subtext adds depth to the striking visuais. Best DVD extra is twelve minutes of deleted footage. (Fox 571/199: $719.99 on DVD

(Miles Fielderi


Paui Newman does an excellent jOl) as Henry. a con who manages to fake a stroke in order to get out of prison and find the stash from his last Job. He ends up in an old folks home being looked after by Carol (Linda Fioi‘entinot. a clued up nurse who doesn't fall for his game for one minute. In fact she turns it to her advantage and convinces him to do one last iob. Full action and wise cracks. this no nonsense film takes yeti along on a caper carried out by the new Bonnie and old Clyde. (Warner) (Jane Hamilton)


Me, Myself, I (Buena Vista) Sliding Doors meets Bridget Jones '3 Diary. Stars AtiSSie Rachel Griffiths.

Nutty Professor II: The Klumps (Universal) Eddie Murphy's back playing the whole gravitationally challenged family.

Permanent Midnight (Columbia €14.99) True stOry of a Hollywood writer With a nasty drug problem. Stars Ben Stiller.

Tom’s Midnight Garden iMGM €12.99: $19.99 on DVD Old- iashioned children's mystery tale.

U-571 (Entertainment €14.99: €15.99 wideSCreen) Excmng World War II submarine action adventure.



8802, Thu 29 Mar, 11.20pm 00.

Davrd Burke is an American who helps run WHITEDOG. an organisation to help ban televrsion and here he uses this excellent personal View slot to tell us why the box is the last thing we need. It all begs the question: should he be appearing on TV to illustrate this fact? 'See this as the warning on a packet of cigarettes.‘ he inSists. Burke does make some excellent points against the arguments made by self-promoting TV execs. In his view. TV does not create community empathy or have the power to relax and educate you. It is on this last point that it is difficult to agree. His native ceiintry may have the copyright on shows made up of equal parts detritus and unsurprising fact but we have a brilliant legacy of documentaries from the Orrin/bus and Arena stables; after all, it was a South Bank Show specral on The Smiths

that inspired Damon Albarn to forn‘ a band actually maybe ll‘ilS guy has got a point. iPaul Dalei



Channel 5, Tue 3 Apr. 9pm 0000

Quentin Taiantino's in France iust now shooting his 'men on a mission' World War ll adventure G/orious Bastards. And where do you think he got the idea for this kind of war movie? Ke//y's Heroes. that's where. This 1970 all-star actioner really kicks ass.

Havrng completed his boot—camp training, co— starring wrth Richard Burton in another mission movre Where Eagles Dare. Clint Eastwood here takes the key role as the GI leading his dishonest and dishevelled platoon through France. taking time Out of Winning the war to rob a bank full of German gold bullion. Eastwood stays at his laconic best. while Donald Sutherland shines as the hippie tank commander who gives him a hand With the heist as well as playing classical musrc going into battle and blasting enemy tanks with psychedelic paint bombs.

No doubt most of us have seen this film countless times over Easter and Christmas periods. but you'll be surprised by how thoroughly entertaining Kelly's Heroes still is. They don't make 'em

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mutated oxei the ?.iw'_ centun. is savvy-tn l‘ i rarely dist‘ussi-lf. ‘. » Ori Bi attempts t tni ~ the yen, roots it th‘ artfoim and liiiihfisiii' ° most skilled an i pioneering expi "'lt tr"; Starting out I." America's Deer Si rifr Wllll the earliest tiliii-u and hillbilly ll‘llfilt‘. .‘.r' follow a lineage .'.'r: encompasses the earl, country soiiiirls. :llt' cynical rasp of tioiik, tonk, the almost accrdental rock 'n' U :i Bill Haley through ti tru- world—doiiiinatirig iii; and lips of Elvis Pit vile, First-hand testarriir‘t from the likes of Kiiitri Richards. Raf, Charles. BB. King and flllllli’:l , i: behindthe—sceries player's add to the series' guality: lllfr ()f‘il, thing to p( ssibl‘, complain about is tlwif the individual parts ill" too short. The filriimakers could lia xi: spent an entire programriie talking about the early bluesmen or the (jfflilll‘i Of Hank Williams thl’l if gets frustrating when don't get to see iron,- «x' their rare footage. Essential viewing for anyone with ears. (Mark Robertsoiii

Kelly’s Heroes is an all-star actioner that kicks ass

29 Mar—12 Apr 209‘ THE LIST 103