Going out nightclubbing is just like a David Lynch film. Nothing quite makes sense, seemingly meaningless conversations are imbued with great significance and there’s always a dwarf in the corner singing backwards. Peachy Keen is set to push the comparison to its limit. Jack Mottram has a damn fine cup of coffee with his foolish friend.

Wait a minute, going clubbing is nothing like a David Lynch film. You're obviously going to the wrong nightclubs. mate. althoogh the dwarf bit might be pushing it. In any case. the team behind popular cult TV and film pre-club The Man With No Suitcase are making an effort to bring a taste of Lynch to your night on the town.

How? Do the DJs suddenly change into different characters halfway through the evening leaving audiences baffled? Probably not. but in celebration of the release of Lynch's latest. Mulho/land Drive. the pre-club is hosting a “Peachy Keen“ night of music from the auteur's filmography and tracks inspired by his oeuvre. from bad-ass Badalamenti cuts to exclusrve songs from local group Bozilla in homage to our Dave.

Any attempts to evoke that trademark visual style? Why. yes. Complementing the soundtrack there's projections, film clips and animations. According to promoter Doctor Ashton Lamont these will run the gamut. from 'sinister‘ to ‘weird‘.

Erm, it will be a laugh though, won’t it? Oh yes. There's a Quiz to sate the obsessives' thirst to show off their complete grasp of Lynchiana. free donuts for anyone who pitches up dressed as their fave film character, a Log Lady Lotto with fabulous prizes and a Miss Twin Peaks competition. And. for those of a sporting bent. a few rounds of Leland Palmer Crazy Golf. Leland Palmer Crazy what? Golf. You mean you've never played? It's much the same as bog—standard crazy golf, only participants wear Leland Palmer masks. and have to hit the ball through Twin Peaks landmarks.

That’s weird. Well exactly. as a David Lynch theme night haven't yOu been listening at all? And there wasn't room in the pub for a Straight Story cross- c0untry lawnmower race.

I Peachy Keen IS at the Griff/Hy, Glasgow, Sun 6 Jan.

64 THE LIST 4 717 Jan 2X)?

I Shake The Disease at the Soundhaus. Monthly. Next date 26 Jan with jun yle pioneers Shut L’p & Dance. I ulsa Presents: Vinyl at Vault. l lpm—3am. £5 (£4). Weekly. Mighty popular residency frotn Andy L'nger and Lady Shae-D. devoted to underground disco, vocal house and New York (iarage. Early arrival more than makes sense. I Subculture at MAS (in association with the Stib Club). llpm--4am. £l(). Weekly. Subculture has been going strong for over fourteen years and has become legendary. with its reputation going well beyond the Glasgow community . . . and it’s all down to Harri and Domenic serving up quality sounds to one of the tnost loyal and unique crowds there is. I Superfly at the Woodside Social Club. Monthly. Next date 2 Feb. I Super Stereo at Soba. l l pin-3am. Free before midnight. £4 after. Weekly. Concentrating on the raw end of the funk spectrum. Jared and Stuart of Vinyl Freaks keep the crowd on their toes with occasional doses of disco and garage. Traxx at the Arches. l lpm-~3am. £10. 12 Jan. (Please note this move to Sat is for one month only.) It all went a bit Pete Tong last month. Moody Man missed his flight and didn't quite make it to Glasgow, but all going well. the DJ supremo will be making an exceptionally rare appearance this month alongside Traxx resident Simon Cordiner. Although known for producing quality house music. Moody Man‘s records draw on influences from all musical genres so expect anything front techno. funk soul. jazz. and disco but most of all expect some serious head fucking. See llitlist. I Triumph at the Tunnel. l().3()pm—3.30am. £9 (£7). Weekly. (‘olin Tevendale and Steven Mc(‘reery supply the dressed-up glamour kids with progressive house and trance in the tnain room. while Kevin MacFarlane and Stephen Lee tnix up garage. disco and vocal house in roont two. If you‘re not wearing aw fully nice clothes. however. don't expect to get in. I No Tun at Budda. l lpm-3am. £7. Weekly. Geoff Montford and (‘hris llarris get funky with a bang-up-to-date selection of LS house and garage. I Vegas at the Renfrew Ferry. Monthly. Next date 26 Jan. I The Vibe at the Velvet Rooms. l()pm—A3am. £6 (£4): £3 before midnight. Weekly. Keith Pyper breaks out the funky house and garage in the tnain room while Raymond Woods cools things down with hip hop and R&B in rootn two. I Wired at Asylum. (‘aledonian L'niversity ['nion. l()pm- 3am. £thc. Weekly. Glasgow’s longest running alternative indie night with drinks promos aplenty. I Xposure at Archaos. l lpm—3am. £8 (£6). Weekly. Serving up hedonistic hard home and trance from this rejuvenated and revamped venue. your hosts Stevie Kerr. lain Thompson and Dave (iilmour keep the kids on their toes.

Chart & Party

I Bonkers at Bonkers. l lpm 3am. £4 before midnight: £5 after. Weekly. (‘heesy tunes. dance classics and those good old hits from the 80s.

I Boogie Nights at Media. 1 lpm 3am. £6. Weekly. Step back in titne to revel in the tunes of the 7()s and fills. Arrive early to avoid a crushing disappointment.

I Classic FM at Fury Murry‘s.

l lpm-~3am. £6 (£4). Weekly. Dance classics and party tunes, with alternative and rock tunes upstairs in Twister.

I The Garage at the (iarage.

l()pm 3am. £5 (£3) before I lpm: £6 (£4) after. Weekly. Super-commercial party sounds on the main dancelloor and indie classics in the Attic.

I Graduate Club at g2. l lpm 3am. £4 (£3). Weekly. Designed to suit those who have always enjoyed a (iarage-style night out. hill feel a little long in the tooth when surrounded by fresh-faced. lager-stained

youngsters. Steve Davis provides the party anthems.

I The Shack at Shack. l().3()pms-3am. £7 (£5). (‘heesy chart tunes and commercial dance tracks front DJ (iraeme.

I Seduction at Destiny. l(lpm » 3am. £6 before i lpm; £7 after. Weekly. Tonight the club would like you to ‘dress to impress' while enjoying the Usual commercial house ‘n' trance pap.

I Strawberry Fields at Strawberry Fields. l().3()pm-3am. £5. Weekly. (‘lassic party nonsense from the 60s to last week.

Glasgow Sundays


I Bitch School at Nice ‘n' Slea/y. 3pm» 7pm. Free. Weekly. The chaps behind Deathlehem (they have a way with names. bless ‘em) bring you four hours of the hard and heavy stuff. from Ozzy Osbourne to Slipknot. Moshtastic.

I Budda at Bar Btidda. 8pm midnight. Free. Weekly. (‘olin Walker (New York Alliance) playing deep house.

I Divine Intervention at Brel. ()pin—lam. Free. A soothing yet syncopated Sabbath selection to chill the hot-footed clubber. Northern. mod. pop-Latin. French ye-ye and shallow funk. Blended by DJ llushpuppy (Divine. USA).

I The Hustler at Air ()rganic. 5pm--midnight. Free. Weekly. Johnnie Blaze and his occasional guests supply grooves so smooth they'd move yo' momma's ass.

I Man With No Suitcase at the (irifliny. Next date tbc. See separate listing for Peachy Keen.

I Moloco at Moloco. 8pm -midnight. Free. Weekly. Martin St John spins stompin' northern soul. roots. rock and reggae.

I Nico’s at Nico‘s. 9pm tnidnight. Free. Weekly. Billy Milligan. the lan Mellis of dance music. supplies a wide-ranging cheeseboard.

O Peachy Keen at the (irifftny.

Spm— midnight. Free. 6 Jan. To celebrate the release of .l’lll//l()//(Ultl Drive Killerwatt (l'nlimited) presents ‘Peachy Keen'. an evening of Ly nchian visuals. Badalamenti beats. secrets. lies. cherry pies and the Miss Twin Peaks competition. Try your hand at Leland Palmer's Krazy (iolf or relax with the Singa-longa Frank Booth show. See factftle and llitlist.

I Phonic at Moskito. ‘)plll~-lilidltight. Free. Weekly. The boys from Phonic are popping up everywhere. Winding down the weekend. (iordon and Steven play quality house music.

I B8B at Bar ll). 7pm midnight. Free. Weekly. Relax with R&B cuts and take advantage of the generous drinks promos at this city-centre style bar.

I Scratch ‘n’ Sniff at Me(‘huill‘s. 9pm—midnight. Free. New pre-club venture. featuring Danny Barbour playing house. garage and whatever else he fancies. I Soulsa Presents: Vinyl at Strata. 9pm~midnight Free. Weekly. l'nderground quality house. Latin vibes and choicest disco frotn Andy linger. Shae-l) and special guest DJs.

I Soulful Sundays at ’l‘ehai-Ovna.

3 -7pm. Free. Weekly. Soulful chill-out session to help you wind down the weekend. hosted by Ray'mondo and Rodriguez (Fools ()nly‘). Drink obscure teas. play chess. give your body a rest.

I Sunday Social at the Arches. Monthly. Next date 3 Feb.


I Bennet’s at Bennct's.

l 1.30pm 3am. £3. Weekly. Tom plays tunes loved by twelve-year-old girls. pltis some bangin' handbag. to equally appreciative gay men. Funny old world. I Bite at the (‘athouse l().3()pm 3am. Free before I l.3(lptn; £2 l .5()) after. Weekly. A milder mix of indie and rock than you'll find at the city’s premier rock venue on Fri or Sat.

I Bump ‘n’ Grind at the Velvet Rooms. l 1pm 3am. £4 (£2). Wind down the weekend with DM(i's mix of R&B and street soul.

I Chittlin’ Hoedown at the l3th Note ('afe. l lpm 2am. £l. A new night devoted to pretty ntuch whatever the DJs please. including dub. hip-hop and electro with added splashes of indie sttiff.

I Club Tropicana at the (iarage (Attic). l lpnt 3am. £3 (£2). Weekly. Indie. both classic and contemporary. with a healthy dose of Britpop.

I Dream at Strawberry Fields.

l().3()pm 3am. £l5. Weekly. Fifteen nicker might seem a bit steep for a flight down Strawberry Fields. but itt addition to hanging house anthems and saucy dancing girls. the bar is totally and utterly free. Much like a stomach pump on the NllS. I Liquid Cool at Babaza. 9pm -3am. £5. Weekly. A.J.. Kris Keegan and Ian Thompson playing top-notch vocal garage and house to a club packed with hyper- hedonistic twentysomething revellers. all of whom seem to have forgotten that they have work in the morning. If quality tunes and glamorous antics are your bag. Stats at Baba/a are unmissable.

I Optimo at MAS (in association with the Sub (‘lub). llptn 3am. £5 (£4). Weekly. F.xpect absolutely anything from Lady Miss Roland and Twitch & Wilkes. including gut-busting techno. country <3; western. punk and painfully cool electro- pop.

I Pure Funk at (‘lub Bttdda.

l lpm 3am. £5 (£4). Weekly. (ilasgow reacquainled itself with its long-held love of the funk this year. with a brace of nights devoted to the genre. including this one in the bijoux environs of Bttdda.

I Solvent at Alaska. I lptn 3am. £5 (£3). Weekly. (‘olin Davie gives us another reason to go out and get completely trollied on a Sunday night. Playing funky house and whatever he fancies to a crowd of tip-for-il revellers whojust don’t want the weekend to end. I Sunday Best at Sltack.

l().3()pm 3.30am. £5 (£3). Weekly. Jim Da Best plays pop. dance and R&B.

I Sunday Shelter at Ail-Lib. Monthly. Next date tbc.

I Transistor at the Polo Lounge.

l lpm 3am. £tbc. Weekly. Real pop for real people with DJs Niall McMurray and Wayne Dixon.

Chart & Party

I Atmosphere at Destiny. l()ptn 3am. £3 before 1 lpm; £4 after. Weekly. Full-on party action accompanied by getterous drinks promos.

I Disco at Fury Murrys l 1pm 3am. £4 (£3). Weekly. (‘heese-tastic disco fun for students. with Dave arid l’hil spinning the discs.

I Media at Media. l lpm~3am. £2. Weekly. A full-on flavoured mix from rotational residents plus karaoke in room two. Drinks promos a bonus (all drinks £2 all night).

Glasgow Mondays


I Cul De Sac at ('ul De Sac.

9pm midnight. Free. Weekly. Watch you don‘t bttrn your fingers on Dr Paul‘s Quiz of Fire.

I Loose at the Variety Bar.

0pm midnight. Free. Weekly. Alt. country. classic 7()s rock and blues from Paul Shields.

I Open Decks at Bar Jedi.

9pm ~ntidnight. Free. Weekly. A chance for bedroom DJs to take to the decks and win a regular slot at the bar.


I Burn at MAS. l lptn 3am. Free for staff of any pub or club; £3 to everyone else. Weekly. A top party attttosphere is guaranteed at the live-year—old staff night out. thanks to thumping dance classics,