been conning punters for years with her banter. Bolshy and brassy. we reckon she's the queen of cool.


Biog Bruce Morton entered the lion‘s den of live comedy in 88. and went on to present Halfway To Paradise on Channel 4 for two series. Graduating to his first full length Fringe show and a solo TV series Sin in 92. Now a regular on the live circuit. he recently moved back to Scotland and still makes the odd venture into TV and radio. and he even co-wrote a musical comedy this year. For more info visit www. thebarstool. Career high ‘Fringe 1998. Traverse Theatre. A sold-out Saturday night doing my best work in years. In the third row.

laughing his socks off. Sir Peter Ustinov. I can die happy'

Best heckle “‘Have you ever been to Luton’?" Which has to win some kind of Salvador Dali Award for unusual heckles.‘

Humour snippet ‘I tend to do observational stuff like the war against shepherds we're having at the moment." What we say One of the mainstays of the Scottish circuit who can turn his deft hand to any aspect of the busmess.

Age 34

Biog Having been doing impersonations ever since she was a bairn. Murphy went from a stand-up course at Strathclyde Uni to the

Stand's beginner's nights. Her talent for mimicry has led to support and headline gigs as well as touring the north of England and lreland.

Best heckle ‘Oh my God I'm getting turned on. I'm away to the toilet for a wank.’

Humour snippet Murphy does impersonations of Lorraine Kelly and Anne Robinson and makes the lovely Carol Smillie say dirty things that we COuldn't possibly print. Giggle-o-meter With more talent in her little finger than half the celebs she mimics so cruelly. the small screen surely beckons.

Age 30 Biog A musician for sixteen years. an actor for ten. comedy is his newest venture and he's been braving the circuit for the last four years. His biggest brushes with fame have been starring as Mel Gibson's brother in Bravehean and appearing in the ‘Glasgow's Gone Soft' IKEA ads. Career high Supporting Keith Harris and Orville at Heriot-Watt Uni. Best heckle When just abOut to launch into a song ab0ut famous women who fancy him. someone

short song then.‘ Humour snippet 'Why does it always

they're always fucking miserable.‘ What we say Nelson's going from strength to strength satirising modern life and the dumbing down of pop culture.

Age 29

Biog A late starter.

‘the gay Bernard Manning' has made

up for lost time in the last three years. He describes his act as ‘a misanthropist in a bad mood' and has darkened the door of many a comedy club in Glasgow. Newcastle. Dublin. and London. With two Fringe shows under his belt. and appearances on Velvet Cabaret and Caledonia McBrains. Ness plans to test his writing talents on Tam Cowan. Elaine C. Smith and Chewin' The Fat. Best put down? “When I got my willy out and stuck it in a guy's pint. He was heckling so much. so I got it out and it just stunned them all.” Humour snippet ‘l'm trying to get a bit cleaner and maybe do some impressions to make my show appeal

shouted: ‘That‘ll be a

rain on Travis? 'Cause

to everybody. I'm really rubbish at it. but my favourite character is Jamie Mitchell from EastEnders. Now I don't do him. but I think about it quite a bit.“ Giggle-o-meter Offensive. outrageous and monstroust entertaining. Ness likes to get up close and personal. but don't expect camp.

Age 32

Biog Once half of notorious duo Viv and Jill. Peacock is striding out on her own. Her first solo Fringe show. Ji/I Peacock ls Glamorous. meant mixed emotions for Peacock who's been performing for over a decade. Starting as a performance poet. she got into comedy by accident. but is now a certified convert. Compere of the Gilded Balloon's New Material Nights. and the Stand's gay-friendly games mistress. her 2002 Fringe baby is 'Greggs: The Musical'.

Career High ‘George Square in 98. There were about 50.000 people and we got to compere that and do the ten. nine. eight thing and said happy 1998. I quite liked being a rock star.‘ Giggle-o-meter A graceful glamour- puss who's no bimbo when it comes to rib-tickling ditties.

Age 30 Biog This former office junior (‘typing and stuff is my one great skill‘) is no stranger to Edinburgh's finer comedy establishments having started his comedy career in a ‘shitty basement' down the Grassmarket. Now with a regular slot at the Stand and two acclaimed Fringe successes. he looks destined for great things. This year he'll kick those paperclips to the curb as he embarks on a

writing/performing venture with BBC Radio Scotland.

Career High Signing up with the BBC to adapt his popular sketch show Skitters.

Best Heckle? ‘Wuuuuu. er. fuck off. (Office jockey cunt turns to sheep-like friends) I should be up there. eh?‘ Humour Snippet ‘What do you call a middle-aged Glaswegian wearing a

teddy boy suit? The father of the . bride.‘

Giggle-o-meter This local lad is no junior in the comedy department.

Age ‘51 . . l think.’

Biog Started writing and performing in the 808 but there has never been much of an 'alternative’ scene in Ireland: the first club he performed at closed within nine weeks. So he moved to London and became a regular at the Comedy Store. Movmg to Glasgow a few years ago. he's become a common sight compering and performing across the country. Career high After seeing his stand- up act. Graham Linehan and Arthur Matthews wrote a character in Father Ted especially for Redmond.

Best heckle ‘For some reason people don‘t tend to heckle me. perhaps it's because I look like a little bOy lost.‘

Humour snippet ‘Like most people in Ireland I was born Catholic. which came as a shock to my parents they're both Jewish.‘

What we say He may have moved on from his deadpan one-liners to rambling stories but they are still delivered with the same sardonic wit.

Age 22

Biog Watching mate Graeme Thomas perform at the Stand was enough to convince young Ross Craig to sign up for the Stand's comedy classes. And it was there that stage name Teddy was bom. A ‘critically slated' Fringe show with Thomas. Rebels Without A Pause. ensued. but Teddy persevered and a devilishly dark streak is seeping into his boy-next-door material. His contributions to Wild Wednesday is proof that a grizzly bear has arrived. Career High Sole support and compere for Simon Munnery at the Stand.

Best heckle? ‘It was a gig in Oban and there was someone speaking in the audience. and I said: "All right. where's the twat?" and someone else shouted back: “He's on the stage."' Humour snippet ‘When I'm in bed with a woman. I like to . . . he really still in case she notices me and screams.‘ Giggle-o-meter His Cuddly exterior conceals the biting wrt of a man who's smarter than the average bear.

I Did we iii/ss your favourite stand- up? If so. email editOi'<C>/ist.(

17 31 Jan 9001) THE LIST 19