Events are listed by date, then city. Submit listings at least ten days before publication to, by post or by tax on 0131 557 8500. Listings are compiled by Maureen Ellis.


Govan Arts Festival The District Bar. 252 Paisley Road West. (ioyan. 427 5l5l. 8pm. £2 donation. Parrot. Susan Morrison. John Scott and Billy Bonkers kick off four weekends of laughs and music iii (ioyan.

Jongleurs Comedy Club Jongleurs. l.'(i(‘ Building. Renfrew Street. 0870 787 0707. 8pm. £7. (‘raic- ing entertaintnent courtesy of northern comic Alex Boardnian. Iiast [find of Glasgow niirthster Janey (iodley and the towering gent Ronnie lidwards.

New Talent Night The Vault. l I It) Pollokshaws Road. Shawlands. 6-19 0007. 9pm. £5. A host of aspiring comedians take a few practice swings at the big time. Bruce Devlin comperes.

The Thursday Show The Stand. 33.3 Woodlands Road. 0870 600 6055. 9pm. £6 (£5). (itiest compere Vladimir McTayish welcomes to the stage (‘anada’s Tom Slade. pltts (iary Little and Jo Jo Sutherland.


0 Jongleurs Comedy Club Jongleurs. ()mni Centre. (ireenside Place. 08707 870707. 8pm. £8. (ieordie gag maestro Mickey Hutton welcomes to the stage former MTV presenter Ben Norris and former Min/tern [zit/insure star Paul Proy'cn/a.

Big Word Performance Poetry The Tron. 9 Hunter Square. High Street. 226 0931. 9 llpm. £3 (£2). Rob (iee introduces the poetic talents of the compulsiyely rude Annie Wallace. pltts Anita (ioyan. rising star Jenny Lindsay and 50-word storyteller Stephen Barnaby.

Duck Downe The Laughing Duck. 24

Howe Street. 07905 045573. 9pm. £3. (‘amp cabaret packed fill] of fast and furious friyolity. competitions. silliness and gay-friendly ftiii.

0 The Thursday Show The Stand. 5 York Place. 558 7272. 9pm. £6 (£5). Host Iirankie Boyle introduces the wicked satire of San Fran Perrier Newcomer winner Scott (‘aptirro. Standing tip in sttpport are pop satirist Sandy Nelson (see Nelson’s (‘oltimn). Leith‘s Patil McNeill attd comedy couple Matt & i'ttt't‘titl.

The Snatch Social The Liquid Rooitt. 9c Victoria Street. 225 256-1. I0.30pm- 3am. £3.50 (£3). A new era begins at the newly re-branded. filth- lixated. funky disco-ctiiii-cabaret. comically competed by Tap Water Award winner Tony ('arter atid Harry Ainsworth (aka Perrier Newcomer winner (iarth (‘i'tiikshankl back from the dead. Deck manipulated by Babes and 'l‘rendy Wendy (monthly resident).


Anthony King and Steven Dick 'l‘olhooth. Jail \Vynd. 0l786 27-1000. 8pm. £6 (£4). l)ro|l deadpan humour froin King supported by Scottish newcomer I)ick.


Jongleurs Comedy Club Jongleurs. l'(i(‘ Building. Renfrew Street. 0870 787 0707. 8pm. £12. See Tliti 5.

The Stand The Stand. 33.3 Woodlands Road. 0870 600 6055. 8.30pm. £7 (£0). \\'ise-c‘t‘;tckitig ('anadian stand-tip Tom Slade headlines. Support comes from Stcyc Harris. John McBride. Jo Jo Sutherland and host \‘ladiniir Mc’l‘ay ish. The Vault Comedy Club The Vault. l I I0 Pollokshaw s Road. Shaw lands. 6-19 0007. 9pm. £8. Sttrreal humorist Andy [alt/man headlines. with Patil Keren/a. John (iillick attd host Des McLean.

Edinburgh 0 Jongleurs Comedy Club

Jongleurs. ()mni ('entre. (ireeiiside Place.

Monkey Boy. Dance was born.

so we knew we could do it.

human intestine. Hilarity ensued.


Sandy Nelson gets to grips with monkey magic

Last week in the Vault in Shawlands. my drunken sell and a plastered Joe Heenan annoyed manager Scott into giving us regular Wednesdays to do whatever the hell we wanted. The following day. a sober Raymond Meai‘ns actually spoke to Scott in proper sentences Wlll) real words and sorted it all out. Big Yin fav0urite Des McLean completed the four—piece and Dance.

The idea was to put together a night of sketches. improv and characters for a regular audience. The four of us are old—skool showbiz golfing buddies

And so to Our opening night. The music pumped and Raymond ‘leapt' onto stage to introduce the opening topicals. Des had some good stuff about Jordan's nether regions. and in honour of Waylon Smithei's Winning best gay cartoon character. we suggested more: Home Simpson. Poke-a- man. Penelope Clitstop. the Craig Hill Mob . . .

At the irnprov segment our audience suggested we deal with Harold Shipman. Mrs Stephen Hawking and rohypnol. Sick gits. .Joe and | (lid the film stills round. which predictably ended up like a Scorsese movie and presumably always will. (I vaguely recall calling him a 'limey fuck'.)

Later. I helped cult pSychic the Enigma (Heenan) astound the audience with his complete lack of powers just before renowned anatomist and club singer Paddy McCutcheon (McLean) educated us on the mysteries of the

Our special guest Des Clarke topped off the show and the first Dance. Monkey Boy, Dance was in the bag. The applause told us we'd done good. but my favourite comment was from the audience member who said: ‘lt's aboot fuckin' time youse done this.' Ah. Glaswegian compliments.

08707 870707. 8pm. £l2. See Thu 5 and Steve Htighes joins the proceedings.

0 The Stand The Stand. 5 York Place. 558 7272. 9pm. £7 (£6). Witness the ferocious campery of Scott (‘aptirro. with support from bedroom popstar Sandy Nelson. former cabbie Paul .\lcNeill. double act Matt & l’arron and host Jane Mackay'.

The lmproverts Bedlam Theatre. I lb Bristo Place. 225 9893. l0.30pm. £3 (£2.50). Audience suggestions spark surreal scenes of comic madness at this weekly itttpt'oy showcase. 2003 Perrier Newcomer nominee Miles Jtipp (currently trying to find a wife for our future king) leads his fellow students in spontaneous scrapes such as the lost chapters of the James Bond saga.


Jongleurs Comedy Club Jongleurs. l'(i(' Building. Renfrew Street. 0870 787 0707. 8pm. £l3. See Thu 5.

The Stand The Stand. 33.3 Woodlands Road. 0870 600 (3055. 9pm. £8. See liri (i. The Vault Comedy Club The Vault. l l 10 Pollokshaws Road. Shawlands. 6-19 0007. 9pm. £8. See Fri 6. htit with host Joe Heenan.

Madcap Comedy Club State Bar. I48 Holland Street. 946 9289. 9.30pm. £5 (£4). Billy Bonkcrs introduces gag guarantor (ierry (irant.

Edinburgh 0 Jongleurs Comedy Club Jongleurs. ()mni (‘entre. (ireenside Place. 08707 870707. 8pm. £13. Sec Thu 5 and Steye Htighes adds to the laughter t tiotietit.

The Stand The Stand. 5 York Place. 558 7272. 9pm. £8. See Hi 6.


Michael Redmond’s Sunday Service The Stand. 333 Woodlands Road. 0870 600 6055. 8.30pm. £4 (£3). Bearsden posh bloke Neil .‘ylcl-arlane attd guests pay homage to Redmond.

The Vault Comedy Club The Vault. l I I0 Pollokshaws Road. Shawlands. 649 0007. 9pm. £8. l)ayid Kay. Saj. John Ross atid Janey (iodley.

Edinburgh Whose Lunch is it Anyway? the

Stand. 5 York Place. 558 7272. 1pm. Free. l’reel’orm funniness and hangoyer- banishing antics from resident dtio Patil (iraham and Stuart Murphy. lireelstyle) comedy doesn’t get much better than this. Bruce’s Sunday Social Fund The Stand. 5 York Place. 558 7272. 8.30pm. £4 (£3). Resident host Bruce Devlin welcomes to the stage Steye Harris. John McBride and guests.

Monday 9


Open Mic Night The Liquid Lounge. 94 West Regent Street. 353 6333. 8pm. l’ree. Local comedy hero Raymond Mearns hosts this weekly open mic night. showcasing a diyerse hand of merry enteitainers. liancy giying it a bash‘.’ Then there's a free drink for eyery performer.


Red Raw The Stand. 5 York Place. 558 7272. 8.30pm. £ l. Allen (‘halniers and James i't‘l'gllsmi help around eight newcomers on the road to comedy stai'doiii.

Tuesday 1 0


0 Viva Floor Show The Stand. 333 \Vomllaltds Road. 0870 600 6055. 6.30pm. l-‘ree. The comedians still standing from the first series of the Live l-‘lmir Slimi- rally their troupes for more \ iyaciotis mirth. Join ('raig Hill. l‘rankie

listings Comedy

. Ben Norris Currently appearing on our screens in a Blair Witch inspired ad. the former MTV presenter gets back to what he does best: unpolite conversation. Jong/eurs Comedy Club. Edinburgh. Thu 5—Sat 7 Feb.

Scott Capurro He's a poody cat. really, is Our Scott. See him get some audience backs arching as he pussy-foots around the edges of good taste. The Stand, Edinburgh, Thu 5—Sat 7 Feb.

Viva Floor Show The boys are back in town for Floor Show mark three. Join the Rev (pictured). Frankie Boyle and Craig Hill for laughs that shouldn't make it past the censors. The Stand. Glasgow. Tuesdays from 70 Feb.

Jongleurs Comedy Club A cracker of a line-up: Canadian comic-boho Glenn Wool, laid back philosopher Reg D Hunter and our guest columnist Sandy Nelson. There won‘t be a dry brief in the house. Jong/eurs Edinburgh. Thu lQ—Sat 74 Feb. i.. Phil Kay Where is the love? Why, it's all around Glasgow as the scatterbrained meanderer embraces the city he loves with his curazee comedy vibes. See feature. page 15. The Vault. Glasgow. Wed 78 Feb.

Boyle and the Reyei'end ()hadiah Steppenwolfe for riotous antics as they warm tip for their TV renaissance. Romantic Slam Poetry .\le(‘huill‘s. 40 High Street. 552 2l35. 9pm. Free. Slammers who are well-Versed in the words of loyc compete at this ('ity‘ of Lose poetry night.

“Ed Raw Thc‘ Stand. 33.3 Woodlands Road. 08706006055. £2. 8.30pm. Jo Jo Sutherland and Mike Boon are the seasoned pt‘os drafted in to show the stand-up new comers how it's done.


The Comedy Network The Pleasance ('abaret Bar. 60 The Pleasancc. 650 2349. 8pm. £3 £5. ('omedy [one tt'otipcr Rtisscll Howard returns to his festiyal stomping ground. Hairy Watt Comedy Club The l'nion. Hei'iot Watt l'niyersity. Riccarton. 45] 5333. 9pm. £3. Joc Heenan indttlges in dark musings. ably supported by (ieoff Boyl.


'- THE LIST 75