Brel, Glasgow, Fri 19 Mar; Cottier Theatre, Glasgow, Sat 27 Mar

‘I would take the storytelling ability of Billy Connolly, the twisted observations of Eddie lzzard, the energy of Robin Williams, the hands of a monkey - actually, you could almost use the hands of Robin Williams, very similar to a monkey’s - the sweat glands of Lee Evans, the breasts of Johnny Vegas, the ever-evolving hair of Ross Noble, the collar of Harry Hill (in terms of radius and diameter, that’s the finest collar in showbusiness). And if that doesn’t win the Perrier in the next two years, we might as well all give up and talk about sadness and tragedy.’

Dr Des Frankenstein is moulding together his perfect comic from the bits and bobs of his stand-up heroes. The 23-year-old Glaswegian may possess a few components of those comedians but he glues it all with a particularly Glasgow sensibility. To paraphrase a radical new city rebranding campaign, Clarke’s comedy is Scottish with Style. ‘What does that mean?’ he wonders. ‘It doesn’t explain anything. It should just say “Glasgow: It’s got good shops, but not as good as London and still


Scottish with smile

doesn’t have a Harvey Nichols yet”. Or, “Glasgow: The original home of the Ned”. Scotland with Style? It’s quite a boast. And unfortunately I’ve been to Easterhouse which certainly has its own style, though not one that you’d want tourists to see.’

Clarke’s act is a mix of the social and the surreal. A motormouth minstrel with an eye for a disgusting image (how else would you describe someone who believes keech and kebabs are similar treats for your tastebuds), Clarke has stormed the Scottish comedy circuit like few

morning slot on Beat 106, a seat on a comfy weekend sofa alongside Tess Daly and Brian Dowling on SM:tv (‘you have to mind your language when your new audience is nine-year-old girls’) and has turned his life so far around that he’s able to get out of bed at 3.50am for his new jobs.

‘It’s a bizarre existence,’ he confesses. ‘When I started as a stand-up l was rolling in at four in the morning and now that’s the time I get up. But it’s not as if I’m getting up at that time to do a crap job; I’m not

others in recent times. Starting his stand-up career a mere four years back, he’s propelled himself into a

Like a fine Wine. Johnny Cash (pre creaking) or a homemade chilli consumed on day two. some lllll‘gf; l""l)fOV(} Wllll age. Johnny Vegas could easily have sold his granny's soul to the highest bidder by now. but he's remained true to his roots and kept churning out his peculiar brand of anarcho comedy, llere ate a mere five reaSOns why you should continue to take him to your hearts.

74 THE LIST l8 Mar 1 Apr 9004

The Academy, Glasgow, Sat 27 Mar

Johnny Vegas

An artist and a poet

1. He needs your love and support After the breakup of his marriage came the first real critical slaughtering he's had With Sex Lives of the Potato Men. l or some time now, he's told the legendary tale of how he unwittingly ate his pet rabbit Blacky, for tea. This may or may not be the actual truth.

2. You’ll get your money’s worth It's rare for a Vegas show to last the

going down a mine or a sewer.’ That’s a place Clarke ' looks set to avoid forever. (Brian Donaldson)

prescribed period of time allotted by the venue. There are plenty tales of him being forcibly removed from his stage. though maybe that would be preferable to watching him throw up mid gig. It's happened before. it'll happen again.

3. Pick up after yourself If you ever happen to find yourself appearing immediately before him, don't leave anything lying around. For one Edinburgh gig, he went onstage after a brass band who had left behind all their instruments. Bad move.

4. Heat’s got nothing on him It's unliker you'll ever see photos of him stumbling into a central London taxi at 3am, eyes a—bleary, legs akimbo. all his breasts hanging out. He claims his only celeb mate to be Paul Whitehouse. preferring to out booze his pals in St Helens. Though he's not short of famous fans. with Dustin Hoffman describing him as an ‘artist and a poet“.

5. Can I quote you on that? ‘If you‘re heartbroken, you don‘t ring your PR agent. You rock back and fonNards. Crying in your house.‘

(Brian Donaldson)


Gagging for it. . .

BAD NEWS FOR GEORGE Bush. Despite his legendary status as a teller of top funnies, he’s lost out to Chris Rock in a poll to discover the most hilarious person in all of America. Incredibly, the leader of the Free World didn’t even make it into the Entertainment Weekly top ten, beaten to the punch by the likes of Larry David (pictured), Ellen DeGeneres, Bill Murray, Jim Carrey and Jack Black. Even Bush’s straight man sidekick Don Rumsfeld was nowhere to be seen. What do people have to do to get due recognition for their natural talent?

ENJOYING THE NEW SERIES OF Black Books? Well, lap it up while you can as it will be the final chapter in the horribly successful sitcom about a grumpy bookshop owner played by Edinburgh-based Irish comic Dylan Moran and his hapless pals. Bill Bailey and Tamsin Greig. But wipe those tears away as Moran hasn't discounted the notion of taking the show onto theatre stages. 'We might do it if one of us needs an organ transplant.’ he recently stated. quite helpfully.

ON THE SCOTTISH COMEDY film front, the short movie Dancer, ( is set to play the Bermuda International Film Festival at the end of this month. The movie is described as a ‘gentle Glaswegian comedy’ and stars Sandy Nelson (who knocked up some of the music, too), Billy McElhaney and James Martin.

Funnier than George Bush?