Answer machine

After years of wielding ‘The Swords of a Thousand Men’ and leading folks down through The Crystal


' venturing out on the road again. Hopefully with his rubber gloves.

Which time in history would you have loved to have lived in? And why?

The late 18th or the early 19th, in the golden age of the sail. I would have liked to command my own ship in the British Navy and fought in Trafalgar alongside Nelson. What’s the least rock’n’roll thing you’ve done this week.

The washing up. but I do have ‘rock' and ‘roll' written on the back of my rubber gloves to remember who I am. The house is on fire, everyone is safe but you can retrieve one thing. What would it be?

My guitar I've had it for about 20 years now and it's a good old friend.

What was the last thing you stole?

I think stealing is wrong and I approve of the Muslim practice of cutting off the right hand if they do steal but the last thing was when l was a kid some sweets from the sweet shop. which I still feel gurlty about.

If you could wake up tomorrow and have obtained one ability (magical or otherwise) what would it be?

The ability to produce a banquet from my arm so that I could feed my friends at any time of day or night.

Tell us the punchline to your favourite joke?

I hate jokes. they're the first resort of the witless. But for the purposes of this interview: ‘no. she went of her own accord'.

What’s your favourite biscuit?

Ginger Nuts with plain chocolate on one side but they don’t seem to make them any more.

Can you cook? If so, what’s your signature dish? Since having a son I’ve learned to cook. and I do a good shepherd‘s pie. I think.

When did you last cry? What was the reason? Quite recently when I thought my girlfriend didn‘t love me any more.

What makes you a great performer?

The fiery spirit of rock'n'roll. The indomitable, feisty. indefatigable Tenpole spirit.

What’s your biggest regret?

Releasing ‘Wunderbar‘ as our second single because people thought we were some kind of joke band.

What do you like best about your life?

Making love to my girlfriend or playing with my son. What do you like least about your life?

Political correctness.

What’s the best rumour you’ve heard about you? That I'm a fantastic lover.

What’s your all-time favourite sitcom? Why?

It starred Bruce Forsyth as a supermarket manager and I think it was called Slinger's Day. Maybe it made me laugh cos I worked in a supermarket as a lad.

What’s the longest you’ve ever pursued a woman for? And was it successful or not?

24 hours a day for six weeks and I was successful. Have you ever exploited your position as a star to get something? Did you get the results you hoped for?

When we started selling lots of records. girls seemed to find me very sexually attractive. I don‘t know if this is because I am anyway. Would I be guilty of exploiting the situation by agreeing to return their ard0ur? I don't like shagging out of good manners though. That's a big mistake.

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