She may have had the world at her feet as part of the Spice Girls but, as she prepares to hand over the ‘baby’ tag to her very own offspring later this year, a new pair of PJs and a good dance are enough to make Emma Bunton

happy

What’s the most rock’n’roll thing you’ve done today?

| hayen't been rock'n'roll today.

The most rock'n'roli thing I've ever done its/as probably streaking lll LA

in the Four Seasons Hotel. but that ‘.'.'as a long time ago. It was a dare from the girls. We were only allowed

to carry a flannel.

What time in history would you love to have lived? And why?

I unioutd'ye liked to haye been around !:'l the 1.960s. The music. Ell: the Motown stuft’. the fashion. that kind of fun.

Your house is on fire, loved ones and pets are safe, you have a chance to go and retrieve one thing, what would it be?

My pictures. pr >babiy. And aiso I've got an office with ail my discs on the x'xai. I think I'd like to rescue them because they're my memories of hox‘x hard I've worked.

What would be your ideal birthday present?

Pyjamas from La Senza. Nice pyiamas or candles. Things that I'll use

What’s the longest time you’ve slept soundly in one go over the last five years?

I love my steep. so probably a good 13 or 1.1 hours after Strictly Come Dane/rig. I'm still i‘t-Bcoveriitg from ’t ~ it was really hard work!

What was the last thing you stole?

Croissants from room SS(2I".’I(I€' today. and the little pots of jétlll.

RearView ANSWER MACHINE

M MRBUNTON

If you could wake up tomorrow with one new ability what would it be?

To be |tl‘.'lSit)|(Z-. That'd be a good one. You COUICl yisit places and people- that you'd like I > snoop >n. I might snoop on the Royal family, see '.'./'i'iat's going on.

How many times a day do you look in the mirror?

Well. to check my make up I suppose because at the moment I'm on a radio tour and having pictures and stuff done. So probably tour or il‘.(} times each time I go into a radio station.

You could quit your job and start afresh tomorrow and have the skills to do something completely new. What would you choose to do?

I'm more than happy with what I do. I'd

like to be a good cook or something. but for the. being in tlltlSlC is the best Job you can have.

Do you consider yourself organised? How often do you have to look for your keys? I'm so disorganised. I'm quite lucky that my boyfriend Jade is so organised. I‘m alt-rays iike "Jade ‘.‘./tTC'l'C"S the black top I was wearing three months ago' and he'll know.

Tell us the punchline to your favourite joke? 'C ,s they aaaaaar.‘ Don't ask.

What, if anything, is too serious to joke about?

There are quite a few things I wouldn't make a joke about. I don't find blonde iokes funny!

What’s your favourite biscuit? A gingernut. They're hard ginger biscuits and you can dip them in tea.

What song would you hate to be played at your funeral?

The Conga. I want people to be sad when | go. I don't want any happy songs.

How much do you tip in restaurants?

Usually I tip t5—20"::. It the person is rude I'll still leave a tip. but not as mucn.

Have you ever exploited your position to get something? Did you get the results you hoped for?

I'm not really like that. But when I'm out with my friends at a club or restaurant they're the first ones to be like ‘Excuse me. we're with Emma Bunton'. It's so embarrassmg.

Who would you like to play you in the film of your life? Who do you actually think would play you?

I would love. loye. iey‘e Kate Hudson to play me because I think she's great. I don't know who actually x'xould.

When did you last dance? What was the occasion?

Me and Jade are alt-rays dancmg: we've always get music on in the house. We've just got a new puppy. and the other day we were danCing round the house and the puppy was looking at us like we were mad. And then she started chasing us.

Can you cook? If so, what’s your signature dish?

I can do a good roast drnner. and I'm quite good with prawns and gartic.

When did you last cry? What was the reason?

I cried the other day. Just because I'm quite emotional at the moment. It was a Sunday. Sundays are boring.

I Emma Bunton's sing/e 'A// / Need To Know' and album 'Life in Mono' are out now on Unity.

Andl-‘inally...

To mark International

I The Golden Girls A

Women’s Month, which has inspired a live Radio Scotland debate provocatively entitled ‘Why Aren’t Women Funny?’, we present some of the most celebrated ladies who do laughs.

I Dorothy Parker It‘s impossible to do justice to the woman who famously commented ‘I don't care what

104 THE LIST 7 'i‘, Mai

is written about me as long as it isn't true’. Parker's caustic criticisms of other celebrities eventually led to her being fired from Vanity Fair.

I Julie Walters The skilled, much-loved actress brings huge sympathy to such pathetic characters as the decrepit waitress in Victoria Wood‘s ‘Two Soups’ sketch or Acorn Antiques' hunched tea lady Mrs Overall.

sitcom about four pensioners sharing a retirement bungalow in Miami (pictured) must have set the TV execs’ veins a- throbbing. But the hit show. with its quartet of sassy, outspoken and sexually active oldies. was surprisingly risque. introducing such hitherto taboo subjects as HIV, domestic violence, cross dressing. euthanasia and Alzheimer's.

A gurning grotesque who's spent the best part of her career pulling the same face or the greatest screen clown since Buster Keaton? Certainly it takes some kind of

talent to stay at the top of your game for 25 years.

I Jo Brand Brand‘s trademark bored monotone is still capable of delivering deadly comic one-liners. (Allan Radcliffe)

I Radio Cafe: Why Aren't Women Funny?, CCA, Glasgow, Thu 8 Mar. See comedy listings for further details.