RearView ANSWER MACHINE
The one—time boy wonder of Fleet Street recently swapped the red tops for lucrative telly appearances alongside David Hasselhoff. No wonder Piers Morgan reckons being sacked from The Mirror was a great career move
What is the most rock’n’roll thing you’ve done today?
Which time in history would you love to have lived? And why?
Your house is on fire, loved ones and pets are safe; you have a chance to go and retrieve one thing, what would it be?
What was the last thing you stole?
How many times a day do you look in the mirror?
And Finally.
You could quit your job, start afresh and have the skills to do something completely new. What would you choose to do?
l unnrl', enough. one of the best obs I ever did for J()l) satisfaction ".'.'as felling trees in a .voodlanzi l.'l E'ast Sussex .'.’l‘.-(3l'(} I used to trudge deep into the tll‘.(ltil'tll'()‘.'.’lll for fen rnrntrtes and llk’Ell nelg; This bloke Just ctr: trees :io‘.'.'n. And cleared a nage space for a horse gtr'nprng area. Ar‘i: rt '.'.'as ;ust ncredrbq. satisfying. to cut trees down. So I'd probabi, go and be a
\i."ll)(}"’;{t(i'\/.
Tell us the punchline to your favourite joke?
I\/|(l .H‘til “(it)”.
What’s your favourite biscuit? P'obatfl‘, a cnocoaI-z: Hot: Not).
How big do you tip in restaurants? lirr: .'.'e' if l".-:;- fltiil zer‘. giocd serxzce anti l'r‘.‘ (Extras-aver. 'itear‘. =" l“.e na:: zer‘, bad se.";r<‘-::«. I don' been-:2 rn Il‘2f; .i‘rrig r". An‘enca .'.n~:,-re the; :rerr‘ar‘a 9i: cue". .‘ tr‘e‘. grae't you four glasses of II()ll\(3(l van-:2 one after the otr‘er. 8c ,ot. hate it: be (rurte frr'n‘ .'.'rth them. When did you last laugh out loud while reading a book? \‘(l‘en '.'.'as reading a book abort Ronnie \.'.’:rlravns oS, Chris l leath. called lee] l'. '.'.'as so iatrglfaizi‘, self»ol>s-:2ss-:2:f
Ilia: r: "‘ake roar .'.'th :aughter al
int; through.
Have you ever exploited your position? Did you get the results you hoped for?
l".e taper". entire Ezfe expiotzng in". r>csztr<>n /\t>so.;i:<:-,.. ‘\.'.’.".a'.'s f'it; pom: ;r‘ haying; org. .rnoortartt. rio.'.-::"f..l gobs if you can't exploit th»:;~'r‘ for
you" :>'.'.'r: .'.ell oerng'? l rke aar
Journalists. l have biaggczr .rrtg'ades and tables in restaurants b1. cfar'r‘rrig l'rn
going to be Latin Mei (3 bso'i.
PIERS MORGAN
Who would you like to play you in the film of your life? Who do you actually think would play you? lactualh knos. the £t'lf;.'.’(i~' to this because the, are f‘igtkfitt a film of in". first book, lhe /,"f{/()t,’". lt's a toss'up bets/eon Colin, l s"tl‘ and tl‘e lead actor 'n Spooks. the good ookn‘g o'ie. l lugl‘. (‘irant's banned » l'.'.'o..' :ir"t et hrrn play rne.
When did you last dance? What was the occasion?
las‘. night. at the exert l was teiir'ig l,ou about. to \JM: lalkrr‘." lzj. tl‘e Bee
Gees.
What makes you good at what you do?
ldcn't take gth','tl":'ig too serrxrs‘jh .'.'br::n s enorrnctrsfj. 'i~:;-?r:tux rr‘ this business. fétll)f3(l"il)(3 to iii-1:8'thill‘ Conner! )Yl!l()5;<)t)ll‘,3 there's the !'(:£ir '.'.'(:rI<l and then there's SHE‘S.t)tlf;*"i:i;fé and the lll(}()l£‘. ‘.'.'nrcit rs ai' "atrter s11". What’s your biggest regret? Not gettrrig sacked from the .'r"o' earlier. lI-I:(I£ttlf;(‘: it turn-:21: out to or: a
br'rll'ar". ::a"<;er "one.
What’s the longest you’ve ever pursued a woman for? And was it successful or not?
On it :ioesn't take tltat long. Obs-:2
.he, 71:|ll"l. sighs. .l‘(:lt:f)'l()(:f>(,<t1,t‘
What do you like least about your life?
Not a of to be honest. I like rag. :‘e. As ior‘g as you lill(l a too you real, c~"io{. ther‘. life's oret’g. arria/rng. because .'.'ork becomes a rzr-c-astr'tx So don". have anything to (I()ll‘.l)l£til‘ about at all
rt 3% ll;
What do you like best about your life?
Variety One mintrte car‘ be dancing; ‘.'.'IT.'l the Bee Gees arm The next I“ mite lcar‘ be back '1 Ho ,‘.'.:><:<: Wag; rig dancing cons .'.itr‘ [Jami rl; sst:ll‘::f"
\)l‘ /\’7‘t:’ Mr f: (It). Arc"...
I Do"? You Knox. ’.'.’.'>:> IA”? ,IV‘srgxe' [)xa'ros of lame. VIVA,” '.ake::
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To mark World No Tobacco Day on Thu 31 May we present some lesser known facts about the demon leaf
American natives in the 15th century he threw away what he referred to as ‘certain dried leaves.
I In 1634 the Greek Church claimed it was tobacco smoke that had intoxicated Noah and so banned tobacco use.
I Our long and cor'nplrcated history wrth tobacco began in (SOOOBC when the plant was discovered growing in the Americas.
I In 1889. there were only 140 known cases of lung cancer worldwide. This year
I When Columbus was first gifted tobacco by North
104 THE LIST
there will be an estimated 213.380 new cases.
I California has banned smoking within 20ft of any public building. and also within all workplaces except tobacconists.
I At the peak of the tobacco industry's flailing attempts to imply that cigarettes were good for you. a 1935 US advertisement for Lorillard
cigarettes urged: ‘Ask your dentist why Old Golds are better for the teeth.’ Seriously.
I Famous smokers include Johnny Depp. Audrey Hepburn (who appears on the cover of Truman Capote's Breakfast At Tiffany’s with a cigarette holder) and Drew Barrymore. who started smoking aged nine-and-a— half. (Cate Simpson)