FirstWord NOEL FIELDING

The Mighty Boosh star on weeping to Johnny Cash and fancying Steffi Graf

First record you ever bought It was Motörhead and it was an album called Bomber. I was quite a weird kid.

Last time you were chatted up Probably last night. Last lie you told Probably last night as well. I lie every day.

First movie you ever went on a date to I went to see Greystoke that Tarzan remake with a girl. It had Christopher Lambert in it. It was one of those dates where you have an ice cream and you watch a film and you hold hands. It was quite innocent. Last time you cried About two nights ago, a friend of mine was playing some Johnny Cash because she had to learn the words to ‘Hurt’ for some performance piece, so she kept playing it over and over and we were absolutely traumatised by it.

Last great meal you cooked I cooked quite a good chilli once, about ten years ago. That’s it. I’m fucking hopeless.

expensive. It was very expensive actually way too expensive. But I was pissed.

First crush I quite fancied Danni in Neighbours this blonde woman, but I don’t know her name. Steffi Graf as well.

Last book you read A Boosh fan bought me an original copy of The Jungle Book, like the first print from 1894, so I’ve just started re- reading that and am really enjoying it. The last book I read in its entirety was Willard and his Bowling Trophies by Richard Brautigan, which is amazing.

Last time you were star struck I actually went to Wimbledon and David Attenborough was sat in the row in front of me. That’s insane isn’t it. He’s like a proper person. First thing you’d do if you ran the country Make the weekend a day longer. Give everyone Monday off as well.

Last meal on earth what would it be? I’d like fish fingers, beans and maybe a glass of milk. In a dish that’s got separate sections like children have, with a plastic bib. Orange food rules.

First song you’ll sing at karaoke ‘Hopelessly Devoted’ by Olivia Newton-John

Last extravagant purchase you made I bought two sculptures of two baboons called Lord and Lady Muck on an antique piece of furniture from an art exhibition and it was quite Last time you exploited your position to get something I do it subconsciously. If we come up to a club or something, or a guestlist queue sometimes I hover about getting my face out and looking impatient and

First three words your friends would use to describe you Vain, ridiculous and abstract. Last time you bought someone flowers

WeLike The things making our world just that little bit better

We may well be behind the times on this one but indulge us: driving away the precipitation blues with some themed Spotify playlists. So far we’ve done songs with rain in the title, songs about holidays and, most bizarrely, songs with body parts in the title. And yes there is a song about tonsils . . . On a similarly nerdy music technology 2 THE LIST 5–19 Nov 2009

hook we’ve been indulging in some iBoxing. Not some kind of Fight Club spin off but a contest/party where two contenders pick a track each from their iPod on a chosen genre and the crowd vote with their feet on whose pick is the best. Think Runaround meets a school disco. We may be honouring a terrorist in

a jaunty hat and goatee (if his press is to be believed) but the best thing about Guy Fawkes night is the fireworks. But do you know what they’re called? How would you describe them? If this is a problem in your life then these folks (tiny.cc/SsU9K) have devised a

video quiz to help you familiarise yourself with the names. Zoom! Pow! Ka-boom!

they often say, ‘Oh Noel, he’s alright. He can come in.’ My Mum, for her birthday about a year ago.

First time you realised you were famous Maybe at the O2 Arena, with 12,000 people. Julian and me were like, ‘What the fuck’s going on, there’s been a mistake.’ When we first came out the applause went on for five minutes and we were like, ‘There’s been some sort of admin error.’ I don’t think you should ever think you’re famous that’s the beginning of the end.

First thing you think of when you wake up in the morning Often jokes or ideas. I always have a pad and a pen near the bed because sometimes when you just wake up you have your best ideas. Last thing you think of before you go to sleep I always have music on before I go to bed, so whatever imagery is conjured up by whatever I’m listening to.

The Pocket Book of Boosh is available now, published by Canongate. The Mighty Boosh Live Future Sailors Tour DVD is out Mon 16 Nov.