www.list.co.uk/comedy

0844 844 0044. 7.15pm. From £24.95. Hot food, dancing, and comedy from Janey Godley, Daliso Chaponda, Keith Farnan and Raymond Mearns. Wicked Wenches The Stand, 333 Woodlands Road, 0844 335 8879. 8.30pm. £6 (£5; members £3). See Tue 7. Edinburgh Fit O’ The Giggles Out With the Old Beehive Inn, 18 Grassmarket, 225 7171. 8pm. £2 (£1). See Thu 2. Melting Pot The Stand, 5 York Place, 558 7272. 8.30pm. £5 (£4; members £2.50). New sketches galore.

Thursday 9

Glasgow ✽✽ highlight Comedy Highlight, UGC Building, 11 Renfrew Street, 0844 844 0044. 7.15pm. From £24.95. See Wed 8. The Thursday Show The Stand, 333 Woodlands Road, 0844 335 8879. 8.30pm. £8 (£7; members £4). Susan Morrison, Ryan Stout, Mary Bourke, Garry Dobson and Mikey Adams crack the jokes.

Edinburgh highlight Comedy Highlight, Omni Centre, Greenside Place, 0844 844 0044. 8.30pm. From £19.95. Another chance to catch Marc Theobald, this time with support from Rob Collins, Sandy Nelson and Mark Walker. FREE Heresy The Jekyll & Hyde, 112 Hanover Street, 225 2022. 9pm. See Thu 2. The Thursday Show The Stand, 5 York Place, 558 7272. 9pm. £8 (£7; members £4). Mick Ferry’s up for the weekend, with Scottish twisted comedy hero Mark Nelson, Isma Almas, Gus Lymburn and Susan Calman.

Friday 10

Glasgow ✽✽ John Cooper Clarke The Arches, 253 Argyle Street, 565 1000. 7pm.

£15. Legendary Mancunian punk poet and all round revolutionary. See caption.

✽✽ highlight Comedy Highlight, UGC Building, 11 Renfrew Street, 0844 844 0044. 7.15pm. From £24.95. See Wed 8. The Friday Show The Stand, 333 Woodlands Road, 0844 335 8879. 8.30pm. £10 (£9; members £5). See Thu 9 for line-up.

Edinburgh We Happy Few presents . . . The Banshee Labyrinth, 29—35 Niddry Street, 8.30pm. £3. A monthly showcase, with acts such as Ben Verth and Who is Jean?. highlight Comedy Highlight, Omni Centre, Greenside Place, 0844 844 0044. 8.30pm. From £19.95. See Thu 9. The Friday Show The Stand, 5 York Place, 558 7272. 9pm. £10 (£9; members £5). See Thu 9. Upstairs @ The Beehive Beehive Inn, 18 Grassmarket, 225 7171. 9pm. £5. This weekend’s bargainous line-up includes MC Keara Murphy, headliner Teddy and rising star James Kirk.

Saturday 11

Glasgow Jongleurs Jongleurs, The Glasshouse 20 Glassford Street, 08700 111 960. 7pm. £15. See Fri 3.

✽✽ highlight Comedy Highlight, UGC Building, 11 Renfrew Street, 0844 844 0044. 7.15pm. From £24.95. See Wed 8. The Saturday Show The Stand, 333 Woodlands Road, 0844 335 8879. 9pm. £13. See Thu 9.

Edinburgh highlight Comedy Highlight, Omni Centre, Greenside Place, 0844 844 0044. 8.30pm. From £19.95. See Thu 9. The Saturday Show The Stand, 5 York

John Cooper Clarke

Comedy

✽✽ HITLIST

THE BEST COMEDY

Having amused and amazed fans both veteran and new during his Edinburgh run in August, the legendary Bard of Salford takes his vibrant verse to the people of the west. Before you go, best bone up on the likes of ‘Beasley Street’ and ‘I Married a Monster from Outer Space.’ The Arches, Glasgow, Fri 10 Dec.

Place, 558 7272. 9pm. £13. See Thu 9. Upstairs @ The Beehive Beehive Inn, 18 Grassmarket, 225 7171. 9pm. £5. See Fri 10.

Sunday 12

Glasgow Michael Redmond’s Sunday Service The Stand, 333 Woodlands Road, 0844 335 8879. 8.30pm. £5 (£4; members £1). Ryan Stout joins Michael, with local funnyboys Mikey Adams and Eddie O’Dwyer.

Edinburgh FREE Whose Lunch Is It Anyway? The Stand, 5 York Place, 558 7272. 1.30pm. See Sun 5.

✽✽ Lee Nelson’s Well Good Tour The Stand, 5 York Place, 558 7272. 8.30pm. £10 (£8). Chavvy catchphrase- monger Lee Nelson is back on the live stage where it all works best.

✽✽ Upstairs @ The Beehive Christmas Covers Beehive Inn,

18 Grassmarket, 225 7171. 9pm. £5. Local comedians take on impressions of their fellow funny people, with tributes to everyone from Sarah Silverman to Dave Allen.

Monday 13

Glasgow ✽✽ The Stand Christmas Special The Stand, 333 Woodlands Road, 0844 335 8879. 8.30pm. £10 (£9). Get yer paper hat on and behold Joe Heenan hosting the Christmas show. With Billy Kirkwood, Mark Nelson and telly favourite Jo Caulfield.

Edinburgh Upstairs @ The Beehive Christmas Specials Beehive Inn, 18 Grassmarket, 225 7171. 7.30pm. £25 including meal (£7 without). The same Beehive comedy but optional meal, mince pies and queue- jump at a nearby nightclub. Tonight MC Keara Murphy introduces comedy mum Jojo Sutherland, Teddy and Chris Conroy.

✽✽ The Stand Christmas Special The Stand, 5 York Place, 558 7272. 9.30pm. £10 (£9). A special festive menu of food and comedians (you can only eat the food) including Ryan Stout, Hailey Boyle, Daniel Sloss and host Susan Morrison. See preview for Boyle.

Tuesday 14 Glasgow FREE Comedy at the Halt Bar The

Halt Bar, 160 Woodlands Road, 352 9996. 8.30pm. See Tue 7.

✽✽ The Stand Christmas Special The Stand, 333 Woodlands Road, 0844 335 8879. 8.30pm. £10 (£9). See Mon 13.

Edinburgh Upstairs @ The Beehive Christmas Specials Beehive Inn, 18 Grassmarket, 225 7171. 7.30pm. £25 including meal (£7 without). Fast-paced comedy from Keir McAllister, with ned representative The Wee Man, Chris Conroy and MC Keara Murphy. Comedy Bee Presents . . . The Canons’ Gait, 232 Canongate, 556 4481. 8pm. £2 (£1). See Tue 7.

✽✽ The Stand Christmas Special The Stand, 5 York Place, 558 7272.

9pm. £10 (£9). See Mon 13.

Wednesday 15

Glasgow highlight Comedy Highlight, UGC Building, 11 Renfrew Street, 0844 844 0044. 7.15pm. From £24.95. Festive fun from JoJo Smith, Dougie Dunlop, Owen O’Neill and Sinck.

✽✽ The Stand Christmas Special The Stand, 333 Woodlands Road, 0844 335 8879. 8.30pm. £10 (£9). See Mon 13.

Edinburgh Upstairs @ The Beehive Christmas Specials Beehive Inn, 18 Grassmarket, 225 7171. 7.30pm. £25 including meal (£7 without). Comedy stalwart Vladimir McTavish joins Keara Murphy, with Tommy MacKay and Alan Sharp.

✽✽ The Stand Christmas Special The Stand, 5 York Place, 558 7272.

9pm. £10 (£9). See Mon 13.

Thursday 16

Glasgow highlight Comedy Highlight, UGC Building, 11 Renfrew Street, 0844 844 0044. 7.15pm. From £24.95. See Wed 15.

✽✽ The Stand Christmas Special The Stand, 333 Woodlands Road, 0844 335 8879. 8.30pm. £10 (£9). See Mon 13.

Edinburgh Upstairs @ The Beehive Christmas Specials Beehive Inn, 18 Grassmarket, 225 7171. 7.30pm. £25 including meal (£7 without). A line-up of fine Scottish acts: Vladimir McTavish, Tommy MacKay with host Keara Murphy.

✽✽ Scottish Comedian of the Year Grand Final Who will be following in the footsteps of Mark Nelson, Sean Grant, Scott Agnew (pictured) and John Gavin? Not Tam Cowan, though he will be performing tonight’s hosting duties. O2 Academy, Glasgow, Fri 3 Dec. ✽✽ Frankie Boyle The never- dull comic plays his home crowd and gives it to them with both barrels. SECC, Glasgow, Mon 6 Dec. ✽✽ highlight Comedy Highlight lives up to its name this week with a top-notch bill of Keith Farnan, Janey Godley, Daliso Chaponda and Raymond Mearns. Highlight, Glasgow, Wed 8–Sat 11 Dec. ✽✽ John Cooper Clarke The iconic Manc punk poet gets all poetic and punky. See caption. The Arches, Glasgow, Fri 10 Dec. ✽✽ Lee Nelson The chav off the telly swaggers menacingly around the country on his Well Good Tour. Beneath it all is the actually terribly nice Simon Brodkin. The Stand, Edinburgh, Sun 12 Dec. ✽✽ Upstairs @ The Beehive Christmas Covers Surely the barmiest gig of the fortnight as some local comics do a Stand-Ups in Their Eyes type thing. Among those being taken off are Mitch Hedberg, Victoria Wood and Jason Byrne. Beehive Inn, Edinburgh, Sun 12 Dec. ✽✽ The Stand Christmas Special Get into the festive spirit with a week of seasonal jollity in both Stands from the likes of Jo Caulfield, Mark Nelson and Daniel Sloss. See preview for Hailey Boyle. The Stand, Glasgow & Edinburgh, Mon 13–Sat 18 Dec.

highlight Comedy Highlight, Omni Centre, Greenside Place, 0844 844 0044. 8.30pm. From £19.95. Very merry comedy from Dave Williams, Johnny Candon, Dave Johns and David Hadingham. That’s a lot of Dave/Davids in one evening.

✽✽ The Stand Christmas Special The Stand, 5 York Place, 558 7272.

9pm. £10 (£9). See Mon 13.

2–16 Dec 2010 THE LIST 59