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HITLIST THE BEST COMEDY EVENTS

Events are listed by date, then by city. Submit listings at least 14 days before publication to comedy@list.co.uk. Listings are compiled by Kirstyn Smith. Indicates Hitlist entry

Thursday 20 Glasgow Avin a Giraffe Maggie May’s, 60 Trongate, 548 1350. 8pm. £5. Jamie Dalgleish headlines tonight, with Chris Conroy hosting and support from The Wee Man, Anna Devitt, John Walker, Wayne Mazadza and Dan Petherbridge.

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I Mark Steel The phrase ‘a different show every night’ will never be more accurate than with this tour, as Mr Steel chats about the quirks of each town and city he visits. Traverse Theatre, Edinburgh, Sat 6 Oct.

Joan Rivers Wonder if she’s mellowed in her senior years? Wonder some more, we reckon. See 5 Things, right. Royal Concert Hall, Glasgow, Sun 14 Oct. Dara O’Briain The Mock the Week hosting guy hits the road for more of his popular askewed-observational thing, with some charming audience interaction no doubt thrown in. SECC, Glasgow, Mon 15 Oct.

Kevin Bridges The likeable Clydebank stand- up keeps his comedy juggernaut steamrolling on with more massive (we’re talking near planet-sized) sold-out gigs. SECC, Glasgow, Thu 20 Sep, Wed 3, Sat 6 & Sun 7, Thu 11–Sun 14 Oct. John Cooper Clarke The northern punk poet genius may have relocated to the milder climes of the dreaded South, but that hasn’t prevented him from ploughing his idiosyncratic versey furrow. The Arches, Glasgow, Sat 13 Oct.

Jack Dee Old grumpy boots (we’re Andy Zaltzman Intelligent

sure he’s a happy chappy behind closed doors) returns to Glasgow as part of a mammoth UK tour. Which we’re sure leaves him feeling just peachy. King’s Theatre, Glasgow, Tue 25 Sep. satirical comedy with a bit of a political edge from the curly-haired Armchair Revolutionary. See My Comedy Hero, page 59. The Stand, Edinburgh, Sun 14 Oct; The Stand, Glasgow, Mon 15 Oct.

Wicked Wenches This month’s daring dames include two of the Comedy Susans (Calman and Murray) and organ- wielding funnylady Vikki Stone. The Stand, Edinburgh, Tue 2 Oct; The Stand, Glasgow, Wed 3 Oct.

58 THE LIST 20 Sep–18 Oct 2012

Kevin Bridges: The Story Continues SECC, Finnieston

Quay, 0844 395 4000. 8pm. £30. The biggest name in Scottish stand- up brings a show packed with astute observations and deathly funny gags. The Thursday Show The Stand, 333 Woodlands Road, 0844 335 8879. 8.30pm. £8 (£7; members £4). A bumper line-up including Rob Deering, Keir McAllister, Kevin Lockard and host Mrs Barbara Nice get the weekend off to a rip-roaring start.

Edinburgh The Thursday Show The Stand, 5 York Place, 558 7272. 9pm. £8 (£7; members £4). Joe Heenan hosts good-humoured Dan Nightingale and observational Brendan Riley. Friday 21

Glasgow The Friday Show The Stand, 333 Woodlands Road, 0844 335 8879. 8.30pm. £10 (£9; members £5). See Thu 20 for line-up. Jongleurs Comedy Show Jongleurs, The Glasshouse, 20 Glassford Street, 0870 011 1960. 8.30pm. £15. A handful of top comedians including R David, Will White, John Scott and Brian Higgins. Edinburgh The Beehive Comedy Club Beehive Inn, 18 Grassmarket, 225 7171. 8.30pm. £5. A weekend packed full of top local and visiting comedians to tickle your funny bone in an entirely appropriate way. The Friday Show The Stand, 5 York Place, 558 7272. 9pm. £10 (£9; members £5). See Thu 20 for line-up.

Saturday 22

Glasgow Jongleurs Comedy Show Jongleurs, The Glasshouse, 20 Glassford Street, 0870 011 1960. 8.30pm. £16. See Fri 21. Comedy @ The State The State Bar, 148 Holland Street, 332 2159. 9pm. £7 (£5). The long-standing home of comedy in Glasgow attracts some of Scotland’s best comedians to its wee basement of joy. The Saturday Show The Stand, 333 Woodlands Road, 0844 335 8879. 9pm. £15. See Thu 20 for line-up. Edinburgh The Beehive Comedy Club Beehive Inn, 18 Grassmarket, 225 7171. 8.30pm. £7. See Fri 21. The Saturday Show The Stand, 5 York Place, 558 7272. 9pm. £15. See Thu 20 for line-up.

Sunday 23

5 THINGS

JOAN RIVERS 1 Born Joan Alexandra Molinsky, she worked as a tour guide, wrote for an ad agency and had a stint as a fashion consultant before entering showbiz. Having changed her name to Rivers (on the advice of agent Tony Rivers), her first break was playing opposite Barbra Streisand in a late-50s play called Driftwood. 2 She thought about quitting comedy early on while appearing in an act called Jim, Jake and Joan. After one particularly bad night in front of a tough crowd, Lenny Bruce sent her a note that said: ‘You’re right, they’re wrong.’ The note stayed in Rivers’ underwear for six months as an incentive to keep going.

3 She made her directorial debut with Rabbit Test in 1978, in which Billy Crystal plays the world’s first pregnant man. ‘Inconceivably funny’, claimed the film’s tagline.

4 Proving she still has some balls about her, the ‘79-year-old’ was recently given a police escort from a US store that had refused to stock her memoir, I Hate Everyone . . . Starting With Me. Her protest included selling copies outside and conducting an impromptu signing session inside while bellowing through a megaphone about condoms, Marie Antoinette and the First Amendment.

5 While she entertains the troops in Glasgow, Andy Zaltzman will be doing likewise in Edinburgh on the very same evening. What’s the big deal with that? Only that the professor-haired comic (Zaltzman) was the support act when JR performed in Scotland for the very first time 11 whole years ago. (Brian Donaldson) Royal Concert Hall, Glasgow, Sun 14 Oct.

558 7272. 1.30pm. Regular freestyle comedy wizards Paul Graham and Stuart Murphy fire up the imagination with another slice of improv action. The Sunday Night Laugh-In The Stand, 5 York Place, 558 7272. 8.30pm. £6 (£5; members £1). The Stand’s Sunday offering features a laid-back bill of comedy delights. With Paul Currie.

Glasgow Michael Redmond’s Sunday Service The Stand, 333 Woodlands Road, 0844 335 8879. 8.30pm. £6 (£5; members £1). Lo-fi comedy to ease your weekend to a chilled close. Edinburgh FREE Whose Lunch Is It Anyway? The Stand, 5 York Place,

Monday 24 Glasgow Chloe’s Chemoo Cows Benefit The Stand, 333 Woodlands Road, 0844 335 8879. 8.30pm. £8 (£7). Billy Kirkwood, Gary Little, Vladimir McTavish and Susie McCabe make you laugh to raise money for the children’s cancer charity.